tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-57893617340835350102024-03-13T12:26:55.250-07:00Marita A. HansenAbout Marita A. Hansen, writing, art, and anything that comes to mind.Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.comBlogger172125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-44294185686165135292024-02-22T17:31:00.000-08:002024-02-22T17:31:15.600-08:00BARCODE Season 1, Episode 1 is Due for Release on March 1!<p>New Cover, new series name... It's a prison drama and will be released as episodes. Though, the episodes will be bigger than the My Masters' Nightmare ones. Due to this, there will be new covers for each publication.</p><p>It's a spin-off from Broken Lives, following Jasper Rakete and a raft of other characters from my New Zealand series. Due to the colourful language and subject matter, it's classed as R18.</p><p> A new episode will be published every 2 to 4 weeks.</p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4Y2n66mWghTmwkbpxkIoMLJxw6zRawO9G9OzgqTMN5ZptcX5QZXSavZaTIStL7F-1eoNmNnSSZf2pZE75T9f3_NycevNv8QYGsw7OJlEiCQ0WeDeFri3bBn3B3eqru4UdNW2JGgANfGNYr-S5eOzEyfugFsV3-CHM0-EGWzlwSlo4hJL7B66YVmxsx_s/s3821/Barcode%20Book%20Cover%20Resized%20Slimmer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3821" data-original-width="2461" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4Y2n66mWghTmwkbpxkIoMLJxw6zRawO9G9OzgqTMN5ZptcX5QZXSavZaTIStL7F-1eoNmNnSSZf2pZE75T9f3_NycevNv8QYGsw7OJlEiCQ0WeDeFri3bBn3B3eqru4UdNW2JGgANfGNYr-S5eOzEyfugFsV3-CHM0-EGWzlwSlo4hJL7B66YVmxsx_s/w413-h640/Barcode%20Book%20Cover%20Resized%20Slimmer.jpg" width="413" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-45473025769886851602023-10-01T20:27:00.001-07:002023-10-01T20:27:39.691-07:00TikTok Video about Book Pirates, Skins and D'Angelo<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dwiakyytnkBl5XIgTL5WeUeGJ9knYkIej78Pz0wKejf_5IwH22BiPdMhZPlRawvSAvn9ZPX4u9gwFNM-8Rb3A' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Here's a video about how badly book pirates affect authors, especially self-published ones. And how they stop sequels from being released.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">P.S. I was using the Bold Glamour effect because 1) I hate putting on makeup, 2) I'm incredibly shy, so hiding behind it was slightly better than hiding behind a mask. BTW, you did well if you made it to the end of the video. I find it hard listening to my accent, cringey as, plus living in New Zealand, you really don't realise how strong it is until you hear it on a video.</div><br /><p></p>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-51580243337936764432023-09-25T22:46:00.001-07:002023-09-25T22:46:53.319-07:00D'Angelo's Cover<p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCdbFcH7q92sTzuGGD9veTrwekTrjOamCALrXCVTTHALLvBqHoILCkrgRNScFlyLLVP5gcCUA4qjQbHZXfjxsgrTTGGPlT_HVojVP_BI50Jz4_ZBqDLeaU4z4n9S7Gi2Gh26IkumkbgFkwYh4uLs8wC-XpE5pY6wCzfEAyX9CXUyFxaL_-LhV9t9qh_IY/s1568/D'Angelo%20Cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1568" data-original-width="960" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCdbFcH7q92sTzuGGD9veTrwekTrjOamCALrXCVTTHALLvBqHoILCkrgRNScFlyLLVP5gcCUA4qjQbHZXfjxsgrTTGGPlT_HVojVP_BI50Jz4_ZBqDLeaU4z4n9S7Gi2Gh26IkumkbgFkwYh4uLs8wC-XpE5pY6wCzfEAyX9CXUyFxaL_-LhV9t9qh_IY/w392-h640/D'Angelo%20Cover.jpg" width="392" /></a></div><div><br /></div><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px;">I was playing about and ended up making D'Angelo's cover. It was totally unplanned, but I'm very pleased that I went with the flow, because I love the writing and colours.</span></p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px;">P.S. I was also playing about yesterday, and ended up writing the start of this book, another unplanned moment. I was taking a break from editing Skins, which only has 8 pages left to check over, and decided to possibly write something for a cover that was made years ago. But the D'Angelo family hijacked the story, turning it into theirs, or in particular, Frano's son. He's not too happy about the arranged marriage that his father has set up for him.</span></p><p><br /></p>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-59533801388140956552023-09-22T01:55:00.002-07:002023-09-22T01:55:24.304-07:00New SKINS Cover: A Prison Drama<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglm72OxOOWtJ0REadlPFHzKyCNqQ-vyLL332Y5VUCIL5-XnSWuusEKRYh5b15pR06wgNh7-bYekrxAiqEefq65AesLx6Yrubyen_BC7iBjXDf-MGL3wDnWy1_Lc_VUH276YI0sA292fGDuZ_SlJ0oHN2yTcH1FKC88es8dia6dSACwP147yV7WlmC9FQY/s2550/Skins%20Cover%205%20(1).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2550" data-original-width="1623" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglm72OxOOWtJ0REadlPFHzKyCNqQ-vyLL332Y5VUCIL5-XnSWuusEKRYh5b15pR06wgNh7-bYekrxAiqEefq65AesLx6Yrubyen_BC7iBjXDf-MGL3wDnWy1_Lc_VUH276YI0sA292fGDuZ_SlJ0oHN2yTcH1FKC88es8dia6dSACwP147yV7WlmC9FQY/w255-h400/Skins%20Cover%205%20(1).jpg" width="255" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><span style="background-color: white; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">In SKINS, Jenna Hamilton goes undercover as a prison guard to bring down a crooked system, while navigating two opposing gangs - one of the gang-leaders wanting to recruit her, the other wanting to bed her.</span><br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px;" /><br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">A Broken Live's Spin Off, featuring Jasper Rakete, along with Jenna Hamilton and Marko from Graffiti Heaven, plus many more characters from all of my New Zealand series and books.</span><br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px;" /><br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">Blurb to come...</span><br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px;" /><br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px;" /><br style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #1e1915; font-family: "Proxima Nova", Montserrat, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">#PrisonDrama #PrisonRomance #Erotic #UndercoverAgent #JasperRakete #JennaHamilton #Marko #Rhoda #Leila #Phelia #Skins #Gangs #DevilsCrew #Bikers #Auckland #NewZealand</span><p></p>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-14221142273436011422023-05-06T01:01:00.000-07:002023-05-06T01:01:38.712-07:00SKINS Cover<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh25UR8yhaGB5WX9vAv9uIKRXrdEul0-3a73H3zSslR58J48klRGpomcwQzUjMLMs8eLvSwP9LiqzCjVxFx37Vin9CqPFXJWE7U8E2fnDfpTE3oo_xXcsYhSv8f0vjIJuoRClIskxVb5BZj6IG3IkQuA3mVfbnweboNvjt9Ees9PFJ7fVaN72cHD87w/s1568/SKINS%20COVER%204.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1568" data-original-width="960" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh25UR8yhaGB5WX9vAv9uIKRXrdEul0-3a73H3zSslR58J48klRGpomcwQzUjMLMs8eLvSwP9LiqzCjVxFx37Vin9CqPFXJWE7U8E2fnDfpTE3oo_xXcsYhSv8f0vjIJuoRClIskxVb5BZj6IG3IkQuA3mVfbnweboNvjt9Ees9PFJ7fVaN72cHD87w/w245-h400/SKINS%20COVER%204.jpg" width="245" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p><blockquote style="border: none; margin: 0 0 0 40px; padding: 0px;"><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">Here's the first book of my prison/gangland drama, which will be classed as drama, romance, and possibly erotica. It's a spin off from Broken Lives, with Jenna Hamilton, Jasper Rakete, and Marko <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 12pt; text-align: left;">Čerin having points of view. Jenna is on the cover. Here's the Goodreads' link: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/123005765-skins">Skins Goodreads Page</a></span><span style="text-align: left;"> It's almost finished, with June or July as a possible publication month.</span></div><p></p></blockquote><p><br /></p><p> </p><blockquote style="border: none; margin: 0 0 0 40px; padding: 0px;"><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><span style="text-align: left;"> </span></div><p></p></blockquote><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /> <p></p>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-34889575371076532232023-03-23T16:07:00.004-07:002023-03-24T02:16:52.674-07:00An Excerpt from SKINS (A Prison Drama/Romance)<p> <span color="rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95)" face="system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-line;">Here's an unedited peekaboo at a scene with Jenna and Phelia talking about Jasper in the ladies' restroom at the pub (from Chapter 9). It's from Jenna's point of view. I'll pop in Phelia's name so you know the first line belongs to her, with Jenna following. Also, different characters have different speech patterns, hence the change between cos and 'cause/wuz and was. BTW, the book is practically ready to send out to my editor, but I'll wait a tick until I finish the second book, which is already well under way and won't take long to finish (a week or two). You'll have two books very close together. I'm doing it like this so you don't have to wait much. I might put them out two weeks apart. Just remember, they aren't episodes like My Masters' Nightmare, they are novels.</span></p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">Enjoy!</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">P.S. If you don't already know, Jenna and Phelia are prison guards at a men's prison.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">***</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">Phelia pressed her lips together.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“What is it?”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“You don’t want Marko, cos you want Jasper Rakete.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“No, fucking way, he’s a prisoner.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“You still want him.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“If you’re talking ’bout my smile the other day, it wasn’t at him. I was thinking ’bout shit and he just happened to look up at the wrong time.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“You don’t needa lie, he’s hot as fuck, totally drop dead gorgeous. Even Mackleby would hit that,” she smirked, “and not with his fist.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">My brow shot up. “He’s bi?”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“More like bi curious for Jasper. That hot fucker made him question his sexuality. Poor Macka got totally weirded out for a while until I calmed him down, telling him that some people can blur preferences, that they're basically gender hall passes. Not like he could act on it, cos Jasper would kill him if he even tried.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“Plus, Jasper’s a prisoner,” I said, like that wasn’t her first thought as to why Mackleby wouldn’t try it on.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“Yeah, that too. So, chill, you hafta be blind not to find him hot. Just be careful with him, he got another...”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">She snapped her mouth shut as the woman flushed the toilet, exiting the cubicle. Phelia turned to touch up her lips, then held out the lippy to me as the woman washed her hands next to us. Not opposed to sharing, I took it, noticing the woman looking at me.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“Your abs are hot,” she said, watching me do my lips.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“Thanks,” I replied, handing the lippy back to Phelia.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“Are you...” her heavily rimmed eyes flicked to Phelia, “a couple?”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“God, no,” Phelia answered. “Just workmates, I like men.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">The woman looked at me. “What about you?”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“Same, I love dick.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">She wrinkled her nose. “What a waste,” then walked out, the door swinging behind her.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">Phelia laughed. “You just got hit on by a chick.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">I shrugged. “It’s happens a lot. I must give off some kind of vibe.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“Nah, it’s this.” She slapped my sixpack. “It hooks ’em in.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“I wanna hook a guy.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">“Don’t worry, it’ll happen, just make sure you don’t flash that to any of the prisoners. They’d come in a second.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">I laughed. “Not planning on it.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;">Her face went serious again. “And especially not Jasper. He got another guard fired, hooked her right in, making her think he wuz in love with her. She totally fell for it, and who wouldn’t with his looks. Just be careful with him, he’ll make you think you’re the best thing since slice bread then drop you like you’re dirt.”</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;"><br /></p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px; white-space: pre-line;"><br /></p><div class="sc-hiCibw bokvvd" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); display: inline-block; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin-bottom: 0rem; margin-left: 0rem; margin-right: var(--global-space-4); margin-top: 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><a class="sc-EsakX dLwfiJ" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23Excerpt" style="appearance: none; background: var(--global-bg-baseAlt-default); border-radius: var(--global-space-4); border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem var(--global-space-8); text-decoration-line: none;"><p class="sc-cidDSM jpkxtS" color="gray2" style="color: var(--global-content-muted-default); font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; position: relative; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;">#Excerpt</p></a></div><div class="sc-hiCibw bokvvd" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); display: inline-block; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin-bottom: 0rem; margin-left: 0rem; margin-right: var(--global-space-4); margin-top: 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><p class="sc-cidDSM jpkxtS" color="gray2" style="appearance: none; background: var(--global-bg-baseAlt-default); border-radius: var(--global-space-4); border: none; color: var(--global-content-muted-default); cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem var(--global-space-8); position: relative; text-decoration-line: none; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"> <a class="sc-EsakX dLwfiJ" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23JasperRakete" style="appearance: none; background: var(--global-bg-baseAlt-default); border-radius: var(--global-space-4); border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem var(--global-space-8); text-decoration-line: none;">#JasperRakete</a></p></div><div class="sc-hiCibw bokvvd" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); display: inline-block; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin-bottom: 0rem; margin-left: 0rem; margin-right: var(--global-space-4); margin-top: 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><a class="sc-EsakX dLwfiJ" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23NewZealand" style="appearance: none; background: var(--global-bg-baseAlt-default); border-radius: var(--global-space-4); border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem var(--global-space-8); text-decoration-line: none;"><p class="sc-cidDSM jpkxtS" color="gray2" style="color: var(--global-content-muted-default); font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; position: relative; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"> #NewZealand</p></a></div><div class="sc-hiCibw bokvvd" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); display: inline-block; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin-bottom: 0rem; margin-left: 0rem; margin-right: var(--global-space-4); margin-top: 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><p class="sc-cidDSM jpkxtS" color="gray2" style="appearance: none; background: var(--global-bg-baseAlt-default); border-radius: var(--global-space-4); border: none; color: var(--global-content-muted-default); cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem var(--global-space-8); position: relative; text-decoration-line: none; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"> <a class="sc-EsakX dLwfiJ" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23PrisonDrama" style="appearance: none; background: var(--global-bg-baseAlt-default); border-radius: var(--global-space-4); border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem var(--global-space-8); text-decoration-line: none;">#PrisonDrama</a></p></div><div class="sc-hiCibw bokvvd" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); display: inline-block; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin-bottom: 0rem; margin-left: 0rem; margin-right: var(--global-space-4); margin-top: 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><a class="sc-EsakX dLwfiJ" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23Romance" style="appearance: none; background: var(--global-bg-baseAlt-default); border-radius: var(--global-space-4); border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem var(--global-space-8); text-decoration-line: none;"><p class="sc-cidDSM jpkxtS" color="gray2" style="color: var(--global-content-muted-default); font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; position: relative; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"> #Romance</p></a></div><div class="sc-hiCibw bokvvd" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); display: inline-block; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin-bottom: 0rem; margin-left: 0rem; margin-right: var(--global-space-4); margin-top: 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><p class="sc-cidDSM jpkxtS" color="gray2" style="appearance: none; background: var(--global-bg-baseAlt-default); border-radius: var(--global-space-4); border: none; color: var(--global-content-muted-default); cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem var(--global-space-8); position: relative; text-decoration-line: none; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"> <a class="sc-EsakX dLwfiJ" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23Skins" style="appearance: none; background: var(--global-bg-baseAlt-default); border-radius: var(--global-space-4); border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem var(--global-space-8); text-decoration-line: none;">#Skins</a></p></div><div class="sc-hiCibw bokvvd" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); display: inline-block; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin-bottom: 0rem; margin-left: 0rem; margin-right: var(--global-space-4); margin-top: 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><a class="sc-EsakX dLwfiJ" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23SpinOff" style="appearance: none; background: var(--global-bg-baseAlt-default); border-radius: var(--global-space-4); border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: 0px; padding: 0.125rem var(--global-space-8); text-decoration-line: none;"><p class="sc-cidDSM jpkxtS" color="gray2" style="color: var(--global-content-muted-default); font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; position: relative; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"> #SpinOff</p></a></div>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-53019193913284549622023-03-08T03:37:00.001-08:002023-03-08T03:37:11.673-08:00A QUESTION<p><span style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-line;">That's 17,047 words of SKINS written so far this week. It's turning into more than a prison drama, family drama and gangland drama now part of it. Yes, a major chunk is behind bars, but a lot is also at the Skins' headquarters. I've just finished Marko's chapter, while Phelia really is a piece of work, only getting worse since Broken Lives. While Jenna, bless her heart, is still a self-confessed dickhead, lol, but one who is genuinely trying her hardest to do good.</span></p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;">Anyway, I need to ask a question, since this story is flying across my computer. Are you willing to wait a week for the next chapter of Hungover so I can write more Skins while inspired? Or should I just finish editing the next chapter of Hungover, putting Skins on hold until next week?</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;">Choices. Either way, I will have two books ready for publication within close proximity of each other.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;">What would you like?</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;">I'm also willing to put up snippets of SKINS on here.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;"><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYBfEjSnYbS2nEKZycZk7y6Nu5dFP0TSCXhKcy7AXdXboNpGmZ1GS_K1BDPgzFV1NBPZYfRVKcQ1KyQfe3zd63EfKpBSGXgHVAz_6nod2Wt9XjcJXa5GeLW0Mbik6H7-RMn5MQYn0D0jby8RXmzxwcdYQOzAAXWUvqnZpH4YqNUfsGuwCZxqKr_9yy/s437/Screenshot%20for%20SKINS.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="77" data-original-width="437" height="88" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYBfEjSnYbS2nEKZycZk7y6Nu5dFP0TSCXhKcy7AXdXboNpGmZ1GS_K1BDPgzFV1NBPZYfRVKcQ1KyQfe3zd63EfKpBSGXgHVAz_6nod2Wt9XjcJXa5GeLW0Mbik6H7-RMn5MQYn0D0jby8RXmzxwcdYQOzAAXWUvqnZpH4YqNUfsGuwCZxqKr_9yy/w565-h88/Screenshot%20for%20SKINS.png" width="565" /></a></div><br /><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;"><br /></p>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-72568848536849505772023-03-07T11:16:00.003-08:002023-03-07T11:16:52.866-08:00SKINS UPDATE<p> <span style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-heading-lg); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-heading-default);">SKINS UPDATE</span></p><div class="sc-chKlql fxWRtG sc-jEItEs drkfkw" data-tag="post-content" style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md) !important; line-height: 1.5; white-space: pre-line;"><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;">I ended up writing just under 12,000 words yesterday on SKINS, and probably would've written more if my husband didn't grumble, lol. I haven't written this much in a day since the time I wrote about 19,000 words for a My Masters' Nightmare episode years ago.<br /><br />Anyway, this is what I have so far:<br />1) Jenna gets an undercover role as a prison guard. I have two scenes before she goes in, and a couple inside the prison so far, one where she meets Jasper. That scene is from his point of view.<br />2) She also meets the other prison guards, one that surprises her, as he wasn't in her dossier.<br />3) You will see Kelley in another scene with Jenna, as they are flatmates now, Jenna having made amends with Kelley. She never gave up on paying for her past sins, and remember, she was 15 and 16 in Crying Out Silent and Graffiti Heaven, so has grown up significantly. She is now 27.<br />4) Jasper's first prison scene O_O I won't say more.<br />5) The most interesting scene for me was at the Skins headquarters, a surprise connection popping up.<br />6) Marko is back and has a point of view for the first time. You will know him from Crying Out Silent and Graffiti Heaven. You will also be surprised at who he is related to.<br />7) Leila is also back, she is from Behind the Hood. She has a couple scenes with Marko so far. He has changed significantly, and is not happy with the way his life has gone.<br />8) I might be taking Killer out of the first Skins' headquarter's scene. I think Fabian might work better in that chapter. He's the vice prez of the Skins. Milan will also be in that scene.<br />9) It's turning out to be a SKINS story through and through. The feud with the Devil's Crew is still there, the DC having rebuilt themselves back up, and are once more causing issues for the Skins. The Sousa twins are at the helm this time, with Matheus as the new leader, and his brother in prison. Matheus hasn't shown yet, but you do see Rafael in a prison fight scene (the guy who had a thing for Killer). He's still a massive arsehole, Jenna making an enemy of him on day one of the job. Before Jenna became a cop, she worked as a prison guard in a woman's prison. And because of it, she thinks that putting someone in their place would work the same in the male prison. She will soon learn that isn't so, especially since Rafael holds grudges.<br /><br />I'm so excited for this story!</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><br /></p></div>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-80240090420705542262023-03-06T03:09:00.000-08:002023-03-06T03:09:55.411-08:00SKINS - A Sneak Peek of the First Paragraph<p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;">Of course, the first paragraph is part of a rough initial draft, so could change, and will most definitely be edited. But I thought you'd like to know that I've started writing SKINS (I'll be doing it at the same time as editing Hungover).</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;">SKINS is about a police officer going undercover as a prison guard, with the intent of busting a drug ring. That's Jenna. She was specifically chosen by her superiors since she has already worked in the field.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;">Anyway, SKINS is Jenna's and Jasper's love story. Jenna is from Graffiti Heaven, Crying Out Silent, and has a cameo in Love Drunk (Broken Lives #4). She was the blonde cop near the end, the one who was cheeky to Dante's and Ash's dad. She's got a smart-mouth and a wicked temper, one that she works hard at controlling. While Jasper is in the first three books of the Broken Lives series. He's Dante Rata's best friend. The reason he wasn't in the fourth book was because he was in prison. A lot of the Skins (his gang) got caught having a chop shop. But since a lot of my readers missed him, not too happy that he wasn't in the fourth book, I thought I'd make it up to you all by giving him his own series.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;">Let me know your thoughts!</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;"><br /></p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;"><strong>SKINS</strong></p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;"><strong>(A Prison Drama)</strong></p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;"><strong>1</strong></p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;"><strong>JENNA</strong></p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;">I opened the door, hoping I wasn’t going to get told to bugger off. Because walking into the sergeant’s office felt <em>exactly </em>like walking into Principal Sao’s office for the very last time. Even after twelve years, I still couldn’t get over being expelled. But it wasn’t so much the expulsion itself but why I’d been kicked out of Wera High. I’d caused so much pain, so much suffering that I’d never forgiven myself for it, regardless of only being fifteen at the time. Which was why I was still making amends, and most of all, why I was a cop.</p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;"><br /></p><p style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important; white-space: pre-line;">*More teasers to come...</p>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-82583013862929180922023-03-03T12:18:00.007-08:002023-03-03T12:19:13.398-08:00My Masters' Nightmare Season 2, Episode 3 Teaser<p> <strong style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); white-space: pre-line;">1</strong></p><div data-tag="post-content-collapse" style="background-color: white; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); cursor: auto; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><div class="sc-bxDdli lPlsg" style="height: 615px; position: relative; transition: all 500ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><div class="sc-hiEfMO fLdEjP sc-dyEwOs kZOWwb" style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md) !important; line-height: 1.5; white-space: pre-line;"><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;"><strong>JAGGER</strong></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;"><strong><br /></strong></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;">I’d known the Black Russian was sick, but to have a child with his own twin was next level. But what floored me even more, was what he’d revealed back in his palace. It was something I couldn't even think about let alone verbalize without feeling physically ill. There were no words to describe it, other than the Black Russian was the most twisted person I’d ever meet. There was something inside of him that was truly evil, something that even the Black Russian himself was terrified of. I wondered whether it was a split personality or uncontrollable urges, or maybe he was possessed by the devil himself. Either way, I’d done what he’d asked, escorting his son to the Black Widow—Nikita’s mother. And a very angry mother after I’d told her what her son had been made to do, or more precisely, <em>who </em>to do.</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;"><em>Matteo Donatelli</em>.</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;">And in front of a crowd.</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;">******</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;">Let me know your thoughts below. I can only continue My Masters' Nightmare if I have the support of my readers, such as recommending the series to other readers, as well as suggesting it to reading groups, like on Goodreads. Anything to keep it going. It's all about readership numbers, which is the only way I can continue these stories since my writing doesn't pay enough to live off, if at all, due to publishing costs. That's why a number of my series are put on hold or discontinued. So, rally up your friends on book sites and help me keep My Masters' Nightmare going, because once I've published Hungover, I am open to writing some new episodes of My Masters' Nightmare while working on SKINS (Jasper's prison drama).</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px;">Thanks in advance!</p></div></div></div><div class="sc-ikJyIC iEJdHt" data-tag="post-tags" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: rgba(11, 12, 15, 0.95); font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin-bottom: 0rem; margin-left: 0rem; margin-right: 0rem; margin-top: var(--global-space-16); padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><div class="sc-ikJyIC hoLGhH" style="-webkit-box-pack: start; align-items: flex-start; box-sizing: border-box; display: flex; flex-flow: row nowrap; margin: 0rem; padding: 0rem; place-content: flex-start; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><br /></div></div>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-33022587554309709702023-02-13T13:29:00.005-08:002023-02-13T13:29:39.123-08:00SKINS (Prison Drama/Romance): Jasper's (from Broken Lives) and Kelley's (Graffiti Heaven and Crying Out Silent) Story<p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Does anyone remember Kelley (O'Brian) from Graffiti Heaven and Crying Out Silent? I've been wracking my brains about who could be the main female lead in SKINS (the prison TV drama I want to write in the same format as My Masters' Nightmare). I really didn't want to create a new character, so was going through the female characters in my NZ books, wondering whether I could use Lavinia, since she was a prison guard in Australia (she came back to NZ after admitting to Dante </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><a style="color: #385898; cursor: pointer;" tabindex="-1"></a></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">that her 10 year old is his kid). But I don't like her, and wanted someone at least likeable. This morning, I just happened to finish re-reading Ashes to Ashes and was looking at Crying Out Silent's sample at the back, and guess who was in it? Kelley! Then I remembered that Jenna caused her to get run over, and she had some sort of spinal injury. So, I went and checked and saw that the doctors said that, because of her spinal injury, that Kelley will only have a remote chance of regaining feeling in her legs, let alone movement. But doctors have said that about others before, getting proven wrong, and in Kelley's case, she lives to run, so she had something to work for. But since her spinal injury was so bad, she's been in physiotherapy for years, taking a long time to walk as well as run again. She eventually does run again, just not competitively, though she wants to. But, that's in her spare time, not work time, and since she can't be a police officer, like she dreamt off at one point (she is angry when she finds out Jenna is one), she goes for a prison guard's job instead, getting assigned to the same prison as...</span></span></p><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto"><span style="font-family: arial;">...Jasper.</span></div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto"><span style="font-family: arial;">As well as the rest of the Skins. She doesn't like gangs, a gang initiation having gotten her brother killed. So, she holds a grudge against gangs (her brother wasn't in one, just in the wrong place, wrong time). Which means she doesn't take too kindly when Jasper gives her attitude on her first day at work in the prison.</span></div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto"><span style="font-family: arial;">Yup, just found someone for Jasper! I know he's having an affair with Fabian's wife, returning her love, but that's clearly not going to end well, since Fabian is the Vice Prez of the Skins. However, I don't know where the plot will take me, with anything possible, I'm just really keen on Kelley finding that special someone since she has had it so hard. Plus, a lot of people want Jasper's story, which means he needs a strong woman to match him, and I think Kelley is that person. She's come a long way, what happened to her in high school making her stronger. Also, she won't take a liking to Phelia, who is also a prison guard there. She might not mind her at the beginning, until she learns more about her, getting to know how horrible Phelia is. BTW, she doesn't know Jasper, since he was in Dante's year, not hers. She does know who Dante is, but not past that, since she was from Ash's year at school. Plus, even if she did know Jasper, he looks different now. But she doesn't, so no worries. Also, this is the prison that Ant ends up in, and she does know him, but that won't be for a while, since Ant doesn't go to prison for a bit. Anyway, I better stop here.</span></div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto"><span style="font-family: arial;">Anyone else keen on Kelley's and Jasper's story?</span></div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto"><span style="font-family: arial;">P.S. Hungover will still be my next book, I haven't been distracted (no matter how much I want to). Anyway, there are currently 8 chapters of it on my Patreon page. I'm also past half way through writing the book, so I'm on track. For all my other books, yes, SKINS could possibly put Behind the Bars and the next Broken Lives book on the back foot, but then again, it's from the same world. It could also be seen as a spin-off from Broken Lives, actually, it would be, since it's about Jasper, which people were annoyed wasn't in Love Drunk. It was because he was in prison! Also, Mrs. Connor (from Behind the Bars and the rest of that series) will still be in it, since she works at that prison. That will make Behind the Bars more likely to happen as well, since I could use both SKINS and Behind the Bars to fuel each other. </span></div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto"><span style="font-family: arial;">Just one thing, I would like SKINS to be a serial, but I'll see how it goes (as to whether it would be suited to a serial or a novel). Also, I read the first chapter of Episode 3 of My Masters' Nightmare (Season 2) and was considering putting it on my Patreon page, but thought it might be a bit boring to put up one chapter and not the rest since I have to do Hungover first. Not sure.</span></div></div>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-89100299767765705882023-01-30T02:19:00.000-08:002023-01-30T02:19:09.025-08:00My Pseudonym Reveal<p> <span style="background-color: white; color: #241e12; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); white-space: pre-line;">Joshua's Cross by M. A. Plume (aka. Marita A. Hansen)</span></p><div class="sc-1sp3zau-0 fYcGch sc-1di2uql-0 fcbMar" data-tag="post-content" style="background-color: white; color: #241e12; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md) !important; line-height: 1.5; white-space: pre-line;"><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><img src="https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1666145416i/63036905.jpg" style="border: 0px; max-width: 100%;" /></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><br /></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em><strong>+</strong></em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em>A web of tears</em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em>A litany of fears</em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em>A media sensation</em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em>A parody of nations</em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em><strong>+</strong></em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em>But you will be the first</em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em>On the worldwide stage</em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em>Of this intolerant, insufferable age</em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em><strong>My dear America</strong></em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em><strong>+</strong></em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;">Joshua’s Cross is my pseudonym book. In it, I say I’m not going to divulge my name, but my pseudonym is burying it, making it invisible amongst the millions books on Amazon. And I didn’t write it to go unseen, so... I’m connecting my name to it so my readership can choose to read it or not. I say this last part because you may not want to read it, as it’s a very in your face book. It’s a social commentary about America, a view from the outside looking in. At the end of the book, it says that I may have gotten some things wrong, while other things right, though the main point is for the reader to start a debate by telling me in their reviews what they think of the story, of the topics. Am I right or wrong, or a bit of both? However, the book isn’t about me, I only have a point of view at the beginning and a very small one at the end. The book is about the characters: DeShawn, Joshua, Izzy, Nico, Jessica, Maggie, Harold, and so many more, representing different sectors of America. It’s also a plot driven book, one that shadows a very old story, the tale of Saint John the Baptist and Jesus, or more like a mirroring, DeShawn and Joshua making the story their own, setting it in contemporary times. Plus, Joshua tells his followers (many times) that he is not Jesus. He is an activist and a preacher.</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;">So, give it a go, and don’t get put off by the seriousness of the beginning, or the satirical chapter. Promise me you’ll read at least four chapters (Amazon's free sample stops somewhere in chapter 5). And once you get to the end of Jessica’s chapter, if you don’t wish to continue, no worries.</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em>It’s in your hands.</em></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;">Also, remember, everyone has different opinions, so don’t get offended if you don’t like what you read. I’m not doing it to offend you, just tell me if you disagree. Debates are healthy, stewing on something isn’t.</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;">Also, they're characters, doing things that would fit their personalities. So, also don’t assume I agree with all of them, because, first and foremost, it’s a story. I don’t always have control over my stories, they take me where they want to go. Writing for me is organic, so sometimes I write not knowing what’s going to happen next or how I’m going to portray a character. Other than, I write what fits them, not me.</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;">Happy reading (I hope!)</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><em>Haere Ra</em>,</p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;"><br /></p><p style="font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); line-height: 1.5; margin: 10px 0px !important;">Marita.</p></div><div class="sc-fFeiMQ jMFrjx" data-tag="post-tags" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #241e12; font-family: system-ui, Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin: 1rem 0rem 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><div class="sc-fFeiMQ dCJAAE" style="-webkit-box-pack: start; align-items: flex-start; box-sizing: border-box; display: flex; flex-flow: row nowrap; margin: 0rem; padding: 0rem; place-content: flex-start; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><div class="sc-1di2uql-6 ehridQ" style="line-height: 30px;"><div class="sc-fFeiMQ gagbKL" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: inline-block; margin: 0rem 0.25rem 0rem 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><a class="sc-1di2uql-7 rVaKb" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23America" style="appearance: none; background: rgb(245, 244, 242); border-radius: 0.25rem; border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem 0.5rem; text-decoration-line: none;"><p class="sc-dJjYzT YliKX" color="gray2" style="color: #706c64; font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; position: relative; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;">#America</p></a></div><div class="sc-fFeiMQ gagbKL" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: inline-block; margin: 0rem 0.25rem 0rem 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><a class="sc-1di2uql-7 rVaKb" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23JoshuasCross" style="appearance: none; background: rgb(245, 244, 242); border-radius: 0.25rem; border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem 0.5rem; text-decoration-line: none;"><p class="sc-dJjYzT YliKX" color="gray2" style="color: #706c64; font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; position: relative; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;">#JoshuasCross</p></a></div><div class="sc-fFeiMQ gagbKL" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: inline-block; margin: 0rem 0.25rem 0rem 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><a class="sc-1di2uql-7 rVaKb" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23Reveal" style="appearance: none; background: rgb(245, 244, 242); border-radius: 0.25rem; border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem 0.5rem; text-decoration-line: none;"><p class="sc-dJjYzT YliKX" color="gray2" style="color: #706c64; font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; position: relative; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;">#Reveal</p></a></div><div class="sc-fFeiMQ gagbKL" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: inline-block; margin: 0rem 0.25rem 0rem 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><a class="sc-1di2uql-7 rVaKb" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=%23SocialCommentary" style="appearance: none; background: rgb(245, 244, 242); border-radius: 0.25rem; border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem 0.5rem; text-decoration-line: none;"><p class="sc-dJjYzT YliKX" color="gray2" style="color: #706c64; font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; position: relative; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;">#SocialCommentary</p></a></div><div class="sc-fFeiMQ gagbKL" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: inline-block; margin: 0rem 0.25rem 0rem 0rem; padding: 0rem; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;"><a class="sc-1di2uql-7 rVaKb" data-tag="post-tag" href="https://www.patreon.com/maritahansen/posts?filters%5Btag%5D=Pseudonym" style="appearance: none; background: rgb(245, 244, 242); border-radius: 0.25rem; border: none; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; outline: none; padding: 0.125rem 0.5rem; text-decoration-line: none;"><p class="sc-dJjYzT YliKX" color="gray2" style="color: #706c64; font-family: var(--global-fontStack-body); font-size: var(--global-fontSizes-body-md); font-weight: var(--global-fontWeights-body-default) !important; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px; position: relative; transition: all 300ms cubic-bezier(0.19, 1, 0.22, 1) 0s;">Pseudonym</p></a></div></div></div></div>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-56600131394626112132023-01-27T03:53:00.000-08:002023-01-27T03:53:02.760-08:00NEWS! I'll Be Revealing My Pseudonym Soon<p> I don't know whether this is to do with my ADHD, since I'm terrible at keeping secrets, unless it's very serious, or whether it's out of pure frustration since my pseudonym book is buried in anonymity, but I will be revealing the title once I work out how to write a warning for it. Because I WILL upset people with it, in particular Americans since it has a political element. BUT, I do encourage you to give me your feelings, to agree or disagree, telling me why it upsets you. The note at the end of the book even states this.</p><p>So, don't get put off by the first two to three chapters, thinking it's purely a criticism. It's not, it's a story, one I want you to read to the end, thinking about the content. To <i>really </i>think about what is said. But not to get so focused on the topic that you ignore the characters and their story. So, when I post the title and my pseudonym name, read to at least chapter 4, even if you're gritting your teeth, because I know some of you will be mad at me for painting one character a certain way. Just hear me out, IT'S A STORY, one that is meant to provoke intense feelings. One that is meant to spark debate, not to get you annoyed.</p><p>Promise me that you will read at least to the end of chapter four, which I believe is in the Amazon free sample, then if the story doesn't interest you, no worries, it isn't for you. But if it sweeps you up and carries you the rest of the way, leave me a review, telling me about what you think. And don't be shy to criticise it. It'll be the first time I won't flinch at criticism, because, as I said, I'm encouraging a debate.</p><p><br /></p><p>To be continued...</p>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-7847563084639990732023-01-25T12:13:00.003-08:002023-01-25T12:13:39.240-08:00A Free Patreon Link/Update<p>A free update on Patreon - about Behind the Lives. I'm now reading Broken Lives to get info for Behind the Lives (in particular Behind the Bars, which is book 5), since it's set in the same world, with a lot of the same characters. Jasper returns! Leave me comments on my Patreon about what you want to read in regards to that series. <a class="x1fey0fg xmper1u x1edh9d7" href="https://www.patreon.com/posts/77739433">https://www.patreon.com/posts/77739433</a></p>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-74903392853598785012022-12-12T12:03:00.003-08:002022-12-12T12:03:17.079-08:00Overwhelmed (Blurred Lines #1) Notes For Writing Its Sequel<div>I'm currently re-reading<i> Overwhelmed </i>since I published it an eternity ago. It's</div><div>for writing the sequel, <i>Hungover</i>, so I don't get anything wrong. So far these</div><div>are my notes at 5%, although some are from memory (from other parts of the book) as well as what is written in <i>Hungover</i>, elaborating on the re-read. It's not much at the moment, but I'll add more to these notes as I continue the re-read.</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Tom Hamlin</b></div><div>1) Bright blue-green eyes.</div><div>2) Maori tattoo on his right bicep (korus).</div><div>3) Doesn't look Maori, but is just</div><div>over a quarter. I don't believe it says this in the book, but I do remember this about him.</div><div>4) A body made on the construction site, not the gym, solid, muscular with a strong physique and six-pack.</div><div>5) Messy brown hair.</div><div>6) Has a sister called Anna.</div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b>Kelly Hamlin</b></div><div>1) Maiden name Botica (Croatian heritage).</div><div>2) Long black hair.</div><div>3) Hazel eyes that look brown most of the time, though is more green, in particular olive green, which becomes prominent when upset, tired or looked at</div><div>in a particular light. Some of this is noted in Hungover's first chapter, but probably is mentioned later in Overwhelmed (not at the point I'm up to).</div><div>4) Good at running in high-school, used to beat Tom's sister in all the races.</div><div><br /></div><div><b><i>Remember, I'll add more notes to this post as I do the re-read, updating it.</i></b></div><div><br /></div>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-42459633495502475202022-12-11T11:59:00.004-08:002022-12-11T12:03:27.328-08:00HUNGOVER (Blurred Lines #2) is finally happening!Ugh!!! It's been decided, HUNGOVER (Blurred Lines #2) is the next novel I'll be working on, getting it ready for publication. Because of this, I'll be uploading chapter by chapter onto my Patreon page. Chapter 1 is on there now. Warning, it has an R18+ rating due to sexual content.
Here's the link to the chapter on my Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/posts/hungover-chapter-75791863
<a href="https://www.patreon.com/posts/hungover-chapter-75791863"></a>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-34932549733210644102022-10-15T19:07:00.001-07:002022-10-15T19:07:19.550-07:00Pseudonym Book On Pre-OrderI haven't written on here for so long. I haven't published a new book for a long time either, probably over two years now (not including translations). The reason is because I've been writing something very different. I got jaded with my writing, to the point where I started writing crap. So, I stepped back and decided to write about something with meaning, something that I've been wanting to do even before Behind the Hood was published. But since it's a story that's set in America, it required more research, especially since it focused on topics that need to be done well.
And now it's finished!
The pre-order went live on Amazon today, and will hopefully go live on NetGalley on Monday the 17th. I wish I could point you towards the novel, but due to it being done under a pseudonym (with valid reasons), I can't outright say it's mine. But I can at least give you some clues, giving you updates on when it's available to read. I also have a private group on Facebook with a few people who know about the book. I may increase that number, but we'll wait and see how things go.Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-64665962751427797732020-06-03T19:18:00.001-07:002020-06-03T19:22:17.036-07:00 Reviewers: Grab MY MASTERS' NIGHTMARE from NETGALLEY before it's too late<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>REVIEWERS</b></div>
<br />
With only 1 week left to request, grab MY MASTERS' NIGHTMARE, Season 1, Episodes 1-5 from #NETGALLEY. Unlike with most of my other Netgalley uploads, I'm controlling the approvals this time, so your request will most likely be accepted. It's rare for me to turn down a request since I'm a pushover.<br />
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My Master's Nightmare</h2>
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Season 1: Episodes 1–5</h4>
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Marita A. Hansen</h4>
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Short Street Books</h5>
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Archive Date 12 Jun 2020</h4>
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Erotica, Mystery & Thrillers</h5>
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<a href="http://netgal.ly/0ob4QY" style="background-color: transparent; text-align: center;">NETGALLEY LINK TO REQUEST MY MASTERS' NIGHTMARE</a></h5>
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Blurb:</h4>
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I didn't see it coming, didn't realize how different everything would be within the space of a month. I would fall in love with one man, I would kill another, and I would lose my body, my mind, my soul - my freedom to them. I was an operative, a strong woman, someone sent in to save others, but under these two men I became weak - or pretended to be. I didn't like being weak, it angered me. If I had free rein I could cut my masters in two. But I wasn't there for pride, I was there to free those women and to take down the two men who sold them as sex slaves.</div>
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Those men needed to be punished</div>
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And I would do it</div>
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No matter the cost</div>
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Or how much I lost</div>
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Because I am Rita Kovak</div>
<div style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 12px; outline: none; text-align: center;">
<i>MY MASTERS' NIGHTMARE</i></div>
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<b style="box-sizing: border-box; outline: none;">Warning: </b>This series is a soap opera, so has crazy plot twists. It also has M/F and M/M non-con and dub-con. It is very dark and violent. R18</div>
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Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-34246918755381261572020-01-19T11:58:00.001-08:002020-01-19T11:58:59.186-08:00ASHES TO ASHES Free Sample<br />
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<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-align: center; text-indent: .3pt;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-l8pUjZ5xBbk/XiS0ELkdv5I/AAAAAAAAA6s/xKCQyr1lOSY_sQjbU79zjv9T5lh8ZvjowCLcBGAsYHQ/s1600/Ashes%2Bto%2BAshes%2BCover%2BSML.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-indent: 0px;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1068" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-l8pUjZ5xBbk/XiS0ELkdv5I/AAAAAAAAA6s/xKCQyr1lOSY_sQjbU79zjv9T5lh8ZvjowCLcBGAsYHQ/s320/Ashes%2Bto%2BAshes%2BCover%2BSML.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">Copyright 2019 © Marita A. Hansen<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">All
rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval
system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means whatsoever without the
written permission of the author, nor circulated in any form of binding or
cover other than that in which it is published. Thank you for respecting the
hard work of this author. For subsidiary rights inquiries email:
marita.a.hansen@gmail.com</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US;">All
characters, names, places, and incidents in this book are either the product of
the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to
actual events, locales, or real persons, living or dead, is entirely
coincidental.</span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 6.0pt; tab-stops: 14.2pt 177.0pt; text-align: center; text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="mso-bookmark: LanguageNote;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;">UK
English is used due to the New Zealand setting.<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
<span style="mso-bookmark: LanguageNote;"></span>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">All other variations are also due to
where the book is set, as well as the characters’ cultural and socio-economic
backgrounds. This is why some characters use different speech patterns from
others, such as in the use of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">’cause </i>versus
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">cos </i>or <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">was </i>versus <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">wuz, </i>the
latter representing a Māori accent. Though, please note that not all Māori
speak the same way, plus many of my characters are of mixed heritage, such as
Ash Rata. Ash is half Croatian, almost half Māori, and the rest Romanian. But
due to where he grew up in South Auckland, New Zealand, he speaks more like his
father than his mother.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I hope this
explains the way in which dialogue is presented in <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Ashes to Ashes.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Although ASHES TO ASHES is the sequel to CRYING OUT SILENT it can be read as a standalone.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><br /></i></span></div>
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<a href="https://www.blogger.com/u/1/null" name="L1"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;">1<o:p></o:p></span></b></a></div>
<span style="mso-bookmark: L1;"></span>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;">L<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The filming of the music video was going
terribly, Dante’s anger growing by the second. His dark eyes were boring holes into
the director, the man poking a lion without even realising it. And it was never
a good idea to make Dante angry, because he had a wild temper. But the director
kept on going, pushing Dante over the edge—both literally and figuratively.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Dante jumped off the stage with a loud thud,
his boots echoing throughout the auditorium. His eyes remained on the director,
a fifty-something man with a crop of grey hair and a beard to match. Martin shot
to his feet from behind the camera, startled by Dante’s sudden and undoubtedly
aggressive approach. They were about the same height, six-foot-one or two,
though Dante was considerably more muscular, which was accentuated by his
clothes. Black leather pants encased powerful thighs, while a black singlet revealed
more of his impressive chest than concealed it. A sheen of sweat also glistened
across his exposed flesh, making the colourful tattoos on his arms appear even
brighter, including the tribal one around his left eye, the dark green pattern
normally looking black. If it came down to a fight, the director was no match
for Dante’s brawn—and it definitely looked like Dante wanted to plant his fist
in Martin’s face.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Dante all but shunted the director back with
his chest, a bull ready to take down the arrogant matador. “Don’t talk to me
like that, motherfucker!” he bellowed in Martin’s face. “I ain’t some bitch you
can push around. This is <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">my</i> video. My
manager is payin’ <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you </i>to make <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">me </i>look good, not treat me like some useless
piece of shit!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin stumbled back, looking both
terrified and stunned, probably not expecting such aggression from a rock star.
But Dante was no ordinary rock star. He was a dangerous man who’d been in a
gang in his youth, the infamous Skins, a group he still associated with. He’d
also been a drug dealer, not someone people should mess with, which was why I
scurried across the auditorium to stop him from doing something he’d later
regret. Even though I hated being around aggression, I was worried Dante would
land himself in jail for assault. I was usually a coward, one who ran a mile or
froze in fear when situations got heated, but no one else was doing anything, the
video production crew probably too scared to challenge Dante. I just wished that
Jade hadn’t popped out to answer a phone call. Our manager was one of the few
people who could calm Dante down, but I couldn’t wait for him to come back.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Looking like Dante was a second away from
planting his fist in Martin’s face, I slipped in between them, startling Dante
out of his rage. “Take a deep breath, Dante,” I said, staring up at him. Even in
my booted heels, he was considerably taller than me, my slim physique also making
me appear smaller.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“How about you take a break,” I said. “Go
grab a coffee or a juice from that cafe down the road.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Dante stepped away from me, appearing
uncomfortable with my close proximity, most likely wary of the crew assuming things
about us. The tabloids were constantly speculating that we were more than
bandmates, a few even printing stories about us having an illicit affair. Of
course it was all untrue. Dante was devoted to his partner, the mother of his
baby, while I was head over heels in love with his older brother.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’d rather have whiskey,” Dante all but
snarled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">A different kind of concern filled me,
Dante a recovering alcoholic. “You know you can’t have alcohol,” I replied. “You
have a loving partner and a baby at home who need you sober. Think about how
upset Clara would be if you fell off the wagon, Dante.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He let out a shuddering breath, his anger dwindling,
replaced by abject defeat.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I also let out a breath, but a relieved
one, though my relief didn’t last long. Dante’s eyes shot back to the director
as the man pulled out his phone, threatening to call the police on him. An
almost animalistic growl escaped Dante’s mouth, what Martin had said only
serving to reignite his temper.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Dante</i>,”
I said more sternly. “Please don’t do something you’ll regret. You need to—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What I<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">
need</i> is Clara,” he snapped, mentioning his partner. “Not this bullshit!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He stepped around me, causing Martin to
shoot to the side, falling over a chair. Dante ignored him, looking more intent
on getting away from the director than hurting him. He stormed towards the
exit, crashing through the double doors. Although our manager was going to be
furious with him for leaving, I knew it was for the best. Dante was far too
wound up to work, plus, if he’d stayed, I didn’t think I could’ve stopped him
from attacking Martin.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I turned to the director, giving him an
apologetic smile even though he didn’t deserve it. “I’m so sorry,” I said,
hoping he wasn’t going to make a fuss over what Dante had done. “Can we please put
this behind us, and try again tomorrow?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin ran a hand over his beard and shook
his head. “I can’t let this pass. If it wasn’t for you, that animal would’ve
attacked me. He has no self-control.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Because he was upset over the way you
were treating him, and honestly, Martin, you <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">were</i> patronising him, treating him like a stupid child. You
shouldn’t have done that, after all, he <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">is</i>
the star of the show.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I don’t need that upstart,” Martin fired
back, his blue-grey eyes stormy. “I have top artists clambering to hire me. And
I wouldn’t have accepted this job if it wasn’t for you, L, because I have no
interest in working with that...that...” He flung his arm out, obviously
wanting to call Dante every name under the sun, but instead finished with,
“man.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I blinked at him, rather surprised by his
remark. “You wanted to work with me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Some of the anger melted away from
Martin’s brutish face. “Very much so. I’ve admired your work for so long,
especially your instrumental pieces. I’d much rather make a video for you than
Dante, but Jade mentioned you’re only working on Dante’s career, not your solo
one.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Yes, I’ve put it on hold,” I replied,
rather flattered he knew my music. I’d mostly concentrated on classical and
heavy metal compositions prior to my best friend hiring me to work with Dante.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin stepped in closer, lowering his
head a touch, the man towering over my small frame. “Honestly, L, you’re too
good for this type of trashy, showy music. You’re also too classy to be working
with an ex porn star.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Dante wasn’t a porn star. Those viral
videos of him were taken illegally. One of his ex-girlfriends put cameras in
his room without his knowledge.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin raised one of his bushy eyebrows at
me. “Did she make him fuck hundreds of women, too? Because his room looked like
a brothel.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I stiffened. “Please don’t talk about
Dante like that, and quite frankly, I’m appalled that you watched those videos.
No wonder you came in here, treating the poor boy like that.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin shook his head. “He’s not a poor
boy, he’s a grown man who needs anger management. He’s also completely
unprofessional, saying the rudest things. If he can’t treat people with
respect, he doesn’t deserve to be treated with respect back.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I frowned, his words unfortunately true.
Dante <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">was </i>disrespectful to everyone,
me included. I’d complained to Jade numerous times over it, but Dante showed no
sign of stopping his unacceptable behaviour. It was a concerning matter,
precisely because it led to incidents like this.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; tab-stops: 101.3pt; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I can tell you agree with
me,” Martin said, running a hand over his beard again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I grimaced, not liking where the
conversation was heading. “I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to speak ill
of a colleague. You’re also only seeing one side of Dante. He’s normally cheeky
and easy-going. Maybe he’s just having a bad day and unfortunately took it out
on you,” I said, lying for Jade’s sake. My best friend had already paid Martin
in advance, and a considerable sum at that. I couldn’t have him walking out,
leaving Jade out of pocket.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Well, if I’m to stay,” Martin said. “Dante
needs to learn to take instruction without threatening me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I nodded. “I’ll have a word to him, as
will his manager.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The dark cloud lifted from Martin’s expression.
“Thank you, L. You’re truly a pleasure to speak to, as well as to work with. I
must compliment you on doing everything right today.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No, thank <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you</i>, Martin. I appreciate your kind words.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He nodded and placed a hand on my arm,
saying something about getting back to work, but I couldn’t take his words in,
his touch distracting me too much. It took all of my willpower not to flinch
away from it, my issues with being touched coming to the forefront. But I didn’t
want to insult the man, so I bit my tongue, allowing him to direct me over to
the area where my guitar solo was being filmed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He brought me to a halt in front of the
large, round bed. It was covered in emerald green sheets to complement my long
ginger and golden hair. “How about we film your part of the video,” he
suggested, indicating to the bed. “We don’t require Dante for this section,
plus it’ll at least fill the next hour or so.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I nodded, quite happy to get my section over
and done with. Filming music videos wasn’t my favourite part of being in a rock
band. It was a necessary evil that I had to endure, especially today, what
Martin had in mind for me rather... embarrassing. But it wasn’t my place to
question such a famous director.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The production crew moved into place,
making me feel a touch caged in. I ignored my fear and went to climb onto the
bed with my electric guitar, fully aware of what I was supposed to do. I’d read
the script thoroughly, making sure that I didn’t waste anyone’s time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin grabbed my arm before I could get
on the bed, pulling out a startled cry from me, what he’d done taking me
unaware. He instantly let go. “I do apologise, L, it’s just... your hair isn’t
quite right. It’s too perfect. We need to mess it up a bit so it gives the
impression that you’ve just had sex.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He threaded his fingers through my hair,
doing just that. I forced myself to remain still, wondering why he hadn’t told
the hairstylist to style it this way in the first place. She’d spent quite a
while making my hair perfect, so smooth that there hadn’t been a strand out of
place, and for Martin to mess it up within seconds felt like a travesty to her
hard work.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He removed his hands from my hair. “Lie on
the bed with your guitar draped across your body,” he instructed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I went to do just that but he pulled me
back again, what he was doing starting to get to me, but I refrained from reacting
this time, not wanting to cause trouble.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He looked down at my chest. “We also need
to fix this top. I don’t know what Wardrobe was thinking.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">To my disbelief, he started undoing the
buttons on my blouse, and if I wasn’t so shocked, I would’ve stopped him.
Within seconds he had my blouse undone, pulling it apart to reveal my bra.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Better,” he said, staring down at my
breasts.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I glanced around, wondering why no one was
reacting to the way he was treating me, but the crew just stood behind their
equipment as though it was perfectly normal. Maybe it was, my experience with
filming videos not exactly extensive, though I was now wishing I’d left with
Dante.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Lie down,” Martin said.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I did, but only to move away from him. I
glanced at the crew again, not seeing anyone acting surprised or shocked by his
behaviour, just men doing their jobs. Maybe I was misreading the situation,
because Martin’s expression was now purely professional, no sign of the earlier
sparkle of lust in his eyes. Or maybe I’d imagined that too, working myself up
over nothing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I laid the guitar across my stomach, strumming
it like I was supposed to. Martin indicated for an assistant to fan my hair
out. The assistant did as instructed, quickly moving out of the camera’s range as
the music for the video started playing. I lifted my mid-section up as my
guitar solo approached, partially raising my body off the bed like in the
script. My fingers flew across the guitar, no sound coming from it, just me
pretending to play along to the recording of Dante’s voice, which blasted from the
speakers, along with the accompanying instruments. The drummer and bassist had left
well before Dante’s and Martin’s argument, their parts completed early.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I continued pretending to play the guitar,
smiling at the camera softly. I felt like an idiot for doing it, even though Martin
looked pleased. He eventually yelled cut once my part came to an end. Rising up
from behind the main camera, he clapped loudly, appearing extremely happy with
me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Now, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">that’s</i>
how it’s done,” he said, smiling wide. “Professionally and without tantrums,
and even better, in <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">one </i>take. It’s a
pity your bandmate doesn’t have the same work ethic as you do, L.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I didn’t reply, not wanting to insult
Dante.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Well, today wasn’t a total waste,” he
added. “I’ll look forward to working with you again tomorrow.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Relieved he was happy, I pushed off the bed
with my guitar. “Thank you. You won’t regret it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I don’t think anyone would regret working
with such a lovely lady as yourself,” he replied.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My cheeks flushed at his comment. I still
found it hard dealing with people treating me like a woman. Even though I was
intersex, my parents had raised me as a male, clueless to what puberty had in
store for me. As the years progressed, I started looking more female by the day,
people constantly calling me <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Miss. </i>Men
also hit on me, not realising I didn’t have what they wanted between my legs.
Regardless, I didn’t feel like I was either male or female, instead, I was
something entirely different, my own personal sex.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin turned his attention to the video
crew. “Everyone, please pack up. Be back here by seven in the morning. We’ll
have a lot of filming to get through due to Dante setting us back.” His
attention returned to me. “Until tomorrow, L,” he said, giving me a slight bow.
“Enjoy the rest of your day.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Thank you, and likewise,” I replied,
watching as he walked away.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I turned to go in the opposite direction,
needing to get my belongings from the changing rooms. My eyes fell on the man
who’d fanned my hair out. He was looking at me with obvious interest. He was
very attractive... or what people would consider attractive, because my tastes were
much fussier than the average Joe or Jane. I didn’t like hot men, I liked
beautiful ones. I also didn’t like being stared at, which the man was doing, making
me feel uncomfortable. It was getting harder and harder dealing with people’s
interest in me. I was used to working in studios, not out front for everyone to
ogle. It was also starting to get scary, especially with how much my fans
obsessed over me. Jade had recently banned me from reading my fan mail after I’d
received a slew of perverted letters, detailing everything they wanted to do to
me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I quickly rushed towards the door that led
to the changing rooms, eager to get back to the studio so I could lose myself
in what I loved to do: creating music—my passion. I slipped into my changing
room, closing the door behind me, my thoughts wandering back to another passion
of mine. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Ash Rata—</i>Dante’s older
brother. I put my guitar in its stand, still upset that Ash hadn’t called me
since the concert in Sydney, which was the day he’d broken up with his partner
after she’d accused him of having an affair with me. Of course he hadn’t. Ash was
too noble and loyal to ever cheat. But his partner had refused to listen, allowing
her jealousies to get in the way of being with such a great man, one I loved
unconditionally. Unfortunately, he was totally oblivious to my feelings—unlike
Tiana. His now ex could clearly see that I loved him,<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> everyone </i>but Ash seeing it. All I was to him was a friend, which
was all I’d ever be.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">It hurt, yet what could I do? I couldn’t possibly
do what Dante had suggested, turning up at Ash’s place, attempting to seduce
him. I couldn’t seduce anyone. I was too shy. Even though people dressed me in
revealing clothes for music videos and concerts, portraying me as some sort of
sex kitten, I was the complete opposite. I’d only willingly had sex once, and
that had been one of the most humiliating experiences of my life. Or more
accurately, I’d <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">attempted </i>to have
sex. It had been with a fellow musician. Not only was my fumbling and
inexperience embarrassing, but her reaction to my crotch was downright
humiliating. She’d actually laughed, telling me I couldn’t even please myself
with a dick that small let alone her. I’d been so mortified. I’d gotten dressed
in a rush, not listening to her backtracking apologies, the woman realising
she’d not only upset me, but had deeply hurt me with her thoughtless comments.
It had taken so much to accept her advances, and I hadn’t even been that wildly
attracted to her, just had given in to my friend’s prodding that I should at
least give people a chance. And I’d only chosen to go with a woman because I’d been
too terrified of men at that stage of my life due to being raped at fifteen.
I’d also assumed she’d be more understanding of my condition since she’d
claimed to like both males and females, my body a combination of the two.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">No, I wasn’t a sex kitten by any stretch
of the imagination. I wasn’t anything other than celibate and lonely. I turned
to the mirror, staring at the person I’d become, so different from what I saw
in my head. I didn’t see the ‘sexy’ twenty-seven-year-old woman everyone else
saw, I saw the scared intersex kid from high school, who’d desperately wanted
to fit in... <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">still </i>desperately wanted
to fit in.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I glanced down at my crotch, seriously
considering taking the next step to becoming fully female, because I was sick
of fighting a losing battle. And if I was being completely honest with myself,
I’d wanted to be fully female for a long time, just had felt ashamed for
rejecting my male side. It had been preying on my mind ever since a doctor had
given me information about gender reassignment surgery after I’d started
growing breasts. Yet, more than twelve years later, I still hadn’t gone under
the knife.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I sighed, wishing I wasn’t such a coward,
otherwise I would’ve done it years ago. Also, rejecting my male side wasn’t the
only thing that was holding me back. The fear that something could go wrong was
just as strong, if not stronger. I was also afraid of not being able to win Ash
over, even after going through with the op. I closed my eyes at the thought of
Dante’s older brother. I’d been in love with Ash from the moment I saw him
twelve years ago, when he’d rushed into my homeroom on the first day of Fifth
Form, late because Dante had caused him trouble. I remembered everything he’d
said to the teacher, how he’d gotten mad with the man for telling him off, then
had climbed over his friend’s desk to get to his own one, receiving another
telling off. And I’d been absolutely besotted. He’d been so beautiful with his
wild, black hair and model-perfect features. He was still perfect now, just
taller and more muscular, as well as tattooed. The designs on his neck and left
arm, the latter extending to his pec, were so beautifully rendered. I’d
imagined kissing them so many times, tracing the tip of my tongue over every
line and swirl of the Maori patterns, the man my own personal masterpiece.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My changing room door opened, pulling me
out of my fantasy about Ash. I opened my eyes, startled to see Martin entering
the room, his presence instantly sparking fear. With the exception of my close
friends, I couldn’t handle being alone with men, what had happened to me as a
teen causing lasting trauma.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I quickly started doing up the buttons
he’d undone. “Sorry,” I said, not understanding why I was apologising since he
was entering my space uninvited.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You have nothing to be sorry about,
beautiful,” he said.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I went still at the compliment, Martin not
having called me anything other than L in front of others. He bit his bottom
lip, his obvious interest increasing my fear tenfold. Nothing good had ever come
from men showing interest in me, their unwanted advances often causing me to
freak out.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My eyes flicked to the door. “Um... I wish
I could stay and chat,” I lied, trying my best to keep the tremble in my voice
at bay, “but I just got a call from my sister, asking me to meet her.” I forced
myself to smile apologetically so he didn’t feel insulted.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“She can wait a few minutes,” he said,
approaching me slowly like a lion stalking its prey.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I backed up into the wall. “What are you
doing?” I said, jerking my head to the side as he reached for my hair.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You have the most gorgeous hair.” He ran his
fingers through the long strands. “So bright and lovely, like yourself<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">.</i>”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Without warning, he grabbed my face,
causing me to gasp, but instead of jerking away, I froze. The memory of Ant
Torres doing the same thing flooded my mind. I’d been fifteen at the time, Ant
sixteen, yet his young age didn’t stop him from assaulting me, what came
afterwards changing my life forever.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You are so beautiful,” Martin said, “so fucking
beautiful.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Before I could protest, he planted his
lips against mine. Snapping out of my stupor, I went to push him away, but he pressed
hard up against me. I couldn’t even struggle, his much larger body making it
impossible to fight him off. He eventually broke the kiss and started running
his lips over my neck.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No!” I cried, my voice coming out soft,
even though I wanted to scream it, my fear working against me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">His large hands moved to my breasts, kneading
them roughly as he continued to suck on my neck, causing me to start crying.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He stopped what he was doing, his eyes moving
to mine. “Why are you crying, sweetheart? I’m not going to hurt you, we’re just
going to have a bit of fun.” He unzipped my pants and pushed a hand inside
them. “Be a good girl... or is it a boy?” He fondled me below, making me gasp
as one of his fingers brushed over my dick. “I can’t tell,” he said, rubbing
circles around it, fear causing it to shrivel up inside my body.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Please stop,” I choked out.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“If you’d just relax, you’ll like it,
cutie,” he said, not letting up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I started trembling, more tears dropping
onto my cheeks.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Ssh,” he said, kissing my wet cheeks, “there
really isn’t any reason for you to be scared, L. I don’t mind that you’re
different.” His hand moved around to my behind, his fingers burrowing down the
back of my pants. “You have everything I need here.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I cried out as he pressed a finger against
my hole.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Get your filthy hands off L!” a loud
Texan voice hollered, startling the both of us.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin’s hand whipped out of my pants. He spun
around to face my manager and best friend. Jade was standing in the doorway, levelling
him with an intense glare.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin straightened, puffing out his
chest. “How dare—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Before he could get another word<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i>out, Jade launched himself at him. I
quickly scrambled to the side as Jade punched Martin in the face. Despite Jade
being considerably shorter than Martin, he didn’t show one ounce of fear. He
shoved Martin into the wall, looking like he was going to hit him again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin lifted his hands in surrender, his
voice pained. “Stop! I did nothing wrong.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Bullshit!” Jade hollered. “You assaulted
my best friend!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I’d never seen him look so angry, Jade
usually a restrained businessman, but right now, his pretty-boy Korean face was
a mask of fury, the veins in his neck ready to burst.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin inched to the side. “Calm down,
Jade, you don’t want to do this. I’ll destroy your company.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Jade stepped in closer, his dark eyes
blazing. “More like <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’ll</i> destroy <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you</i>.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin visibly swallowed, looking like he
believed him, and he should. Jade owned a top music label, not to mention
having his fingers in other companies, my friend liking to spread the risk.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Jade pointed at the door. “Get out!” he
screamed at Martin. “Before I decide to do it!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Martin shot out of the room, leaving me
alone with Jade. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">As soon as he was gone, Jade was in front
of me, his hands going to my face. “Oh, L,” he said, looking distraught. “I’m
so sorry.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I didn’t understand why he was
apologising, he’d saved me, but I couldn’t tell him that. My voice had disappeared,
only sobs coming out. He let go of my face and pulled me into a hug. Jade was
one of only a few men I felt safe around, someone I trusted unconditionally.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He ran a hand down my hair and kissed the
top of my head. “I won’t let him anywhere near you again,” he said, softly.
“I’ll also go with you to the police, backing up what you tell them.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I pulled away from his hug, not wanting
that. All I wanted was to forget this ever happened, like what had happened in
high school.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Jade took hold of my hand, giving it a
squeeze. “Grab your stuff,” he said, letting go a second later. “I’ll take you to
a police station now.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I shook my head. “I just want to go home.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“After you’ve given a statement.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Please, no, I can’t go to the police,” I
replied, starting to panic. “If the media finds out what happened, it’ll be
splashed all over the news. I can’t deal with that. My mam also wouldn’t be
able to handle it. I can’t do that to her,” <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">again.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Okay,” he said sadly, knowing where my
fear stemmed from. “Just let me take you home, I’ll deal with everything else.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I nodded, so grateful to him. “Thank you,
Jade.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He nodded back, watching silently as I fixed
my pants and pulled my jacket on. I grabbed my bag and guitar, allowing him to
direct me out of the room, leading me to his car in the parking lot. Before I
knew it, we were heading for his house, not my apartment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I sat up straighter, definitely not
wanting to go there since Dante also lived at the same address. I couldn’t
handle any more drama, I just wanted to be alone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Not your house,” I said. “My apartment.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You shouldn’t be alone, L.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I have to. I can’t handle being around
others right now, especially Dante. He was so mad at Martin earlier. I had to
stop him from attacking him. If he starts ranting—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Okay,” Jade said. “I’ll take you home,
but I’m staying with you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“There’s no need for that, I’ll be fine.
No one can get inside the building without a swipe key.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’m staying, L, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">end </i>of story.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I
didn’t reply, knowing he wouldn’t listen, and right now, I was grateful. Jade
always made me feel safe—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">like Ash</i>. My
mind returned to Dante’s brother as Jade drove me home, wishing that I could go
to his place instead. Although Jade was understanding, he couldn’t fully
understand<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i>what I’d just gone
through, both now and in the past. But Ash could. He understood how fear overtook
me, because it overtook him at times too, the both of us having been raped at
the same age.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; text-align: center; text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">***<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The next few days went by painfully slow,
Jade continuously asking me whether I was all right, while Dante stalked around
at work like a bull in a china store. He blamed poor Jade for hiring Martin
after he’d found out what had happened to me. But worst of all, he wanted to go
after Martin, describing all the ways he would kill the man.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He continued to pace my office, looking
like a gang member in his worn-out leathers and black singlet, his muscular
arms bunching up as he continuously clenched and unclenched his hands.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You can’t do anything,” Jade said,
watching Dante warily. “Martin’s already flown back to the States.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Dante growled, “The fuckin’ coward.” His
eyes went to me. “Though, it doesn’t change a thing, you still needa lay
charges against him.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I shook my head. “If I do that, it’ll be
front page news. I couldn’t handle that.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“But, L,” he said, now looking concerned,
“you can’t let that rapey bastard get away with this.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Please, Dante, don’t take this
personally. Let me deal with it in my own way.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He flinched, looking like I’d slapped him.
“I’m not taking it personally.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Clearly, you are,” I said softly. I’d
seen him react to a similar situation a number of months ago, right here in my
office. It was after he’d found out that his partner had been sexually
assaulted by her work colleague.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He went to open his mouth, probably to
plead his case.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I cut him off, “Please don’t turn this
into an argument, Dante. You know I can’t handle arguments.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He looked like he was going to disagree,
but instead nodded his head. “If you need me, call me. I don’t care if it’s in
the middle of the night, I’ll come straight over,” he said, his joker side
nowhere to be seen. No darlings, no loves, just genuine concern for my
wellbeing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Thank you,” I replied, so relieved he was
backing down.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Don’t thank me,” he said, looking sad. “I
wish I hadn’t left now. I feel—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I cut him off again, “You’re not
responsible, Dante, so don’t even think it. Martin waited until everyone had
left before he did anything. I was just lucky that Jade came looking for me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Dante turned his attention to Jade. He
walked up to him, giving our manager a pat on the shoulder, changing from
telling him off to showing his appreciation. “Thanks for lookin’ out for my sis,”
Dante said, his words surprising me. He usually called me <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">love </i>or<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> darling</i>, like he
called all females, but never <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">sis</i>. It
made me feel good that he thought of me as family.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He turned back to me. “Does Ash know?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I shook my head at the mention of his
brother. “I don’t want him to.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He frowned. “Why?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Because he’ll do something stupid if he
found out. You know him, know what he’s capable of.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Dante nodded, fully aware of his brother’s
violent side, Dante’s aggression nothing in comparison. Although Ash had never been
violent towards me, or any other woman, he was a totally different person
around men. He often got into violent fights, one even ending in him killing a
man, something he’d confided in me about. I was horrified over his confession,
but had kept it a secret, fearful he would go to prison. Though, the scary
thing was, if he killed again, I still wouldn’t tell a soul, and he would definitely
murder someone if they gave him reason to.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Like
Martin.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Dante shoved a hand through the mess of
black waves framing his face. “I should leave,” he said, turning for the door,
looking like he needed to get away before he went against my wishes, arguing
with me further.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I knew I was a coward for not going to the
police, but I’d always been incapable of sticking up for myself. And the way Dante
left without pressing me showed he knew it too, because he hadn’t folded this
quick when he’d argued with his partner over similar matters.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Jade’s sad eyes went to me. “Are you all
right?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I nodded. “I’ve dealt with much worse,
Jade,” I answered, my words unfortunately true, Martin’s actions paling in
comparison to what Ant Torres had done to me. “I’ll get past this, like I got
past Ant.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Jade’s right eye twitched. “I wish you’d
told me about that monster. I wouldn’t have worked with him if I’d known what
he’d done to you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Martin or Ant?” I asked, not sure which
of my attackers he was referring to.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Ant, although it applies to Martin as
well. Dante’s right. They could assault others if you don’t let people know
what these men did to you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Ant <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">was
</i>punished, Ash saw to that, while Martin...” I exhaled loudly. “You know I’m
not strong enough to weather the media frenzy it would bring. Please just let
me deal with this my own way.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He sighed, looking as defeated as Dante
had. “The way you deal with things is to cut yourself off from people, L.
Please don’t take off again. I need you here, both as a friend and
professionally.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I gave him a sad smile. “I won’t run
again, I have an anchor here.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He returned my smile, probably thinking I
meant him, which I didn’t.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My
anchor was Ash Rata</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: .3pt;">
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</span>
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<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-align: center; text-indent: .3pt;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/u/1/null" name="Ash2"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;">2<o:p></o:p></span></b></a></div>
<span style="mso-bookmark: Ash2;"></span>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; text-align: center; text-indent: .3pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;">ASH<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I gently laid my baby down in her cot, holding
my breath, afraid she would wake up. Lily had been teething, her first year molars
coming through early, keeping me up most of the night with her crying. I was
exhausted, only my boarder looking bright and sparkly this morning. Kara had
even made me breakfast, a plate full of bacon, eggs, and hash-browns, with a
glass of freshly squeezed juice. I knew why she was pandering to me, but it
wouldn’t make a lick of difference. I was still kicking her manipulating arse out
of my house. I was a stupid fuck for letting her rent a room. I’d taken pity on
her after my brother had dumped her for another woman. And what did she go and
do in repayment? She’d actively worked to break my partner and I up, feeding my
now ex with lies about me cheating on her with L. Although L was a beautiful
woman, I’d never even considered cheating on Tiana with her. I hated cheats and
Tiana knew that, so it stung even more when she’d accused me of being one.
She’d screamed and yelled at me, not even considering that I was telling the
truth, which had led me to walk out on her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I went to tiptoe out of Lily’s room, stopping
as Kara appeared in the doorway, blocking my path. Afraid she was going to wake
Lily up, I flicked my hand at her to leave. She did, sashaying her hips as she
walked down the passage, making her arse jiggle. I closed Lily’s bedroom door
quietly, following after Kara, annoyed that she hadn’t left yet. Even after all
she’d done, she was insisting that I give her a proper tenancy notice, which
was ridiculous considering we didn’t have a contract. I hadn’t even asked for a
bond.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She stopped in the dining room and crossed
her arms over her massive tits, her tight leopard-print top almost splitting
apart from being a size too small. “I don’t want to take this to the tenancy
tribunal, Ash, but I will if you push me,” she said with a strong Croatian
accent, something I had no problem understanding since my grandfather spoke the
same way. Kara was full Croatian, while I was half, along with Māori and
Romanian, the latter two from my father’s side. It was why people had a hard
time telling what nationality I was. They usually thought I was either Italian,
Spanish, or Brazilian even though I spoke with a strong Māori-New Zealand
accent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You destroyed my relationship,” I growled
at Kara. “You don’t have any rights.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Not according to the tenancy act,” she
replied, wiggling her blonde head with attitude, “and Tiana destroyed your
relationship, not me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Cos you kept filling her with lies ’bout
me fucking L!” I boomed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She placed a finger to her full, lying,
conniving lips. “Shush, you’ll wake Lily.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I gritted my teeth. “I wouldn’t be yelling
if you weren’t ’ere, riling me up,” I all but hissed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She rolled her pale blue eyes as though I
was a child throwing a tantrum, the woman having a bad habit of patronising
people. “How about you stop letting your temper get the better of you and
actually think. I did you a favour getting rid of Tiana. She never helped with
Lily, and don’t get me started on the amount of times I heard you two argue.
Love dies, Ash. Get over it, I have.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Love hasn’t died, I still love Tiana.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“While I still love your brother, but he
doesn’t want me, while <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you</i> left
Tiana. You could’ve worked it out with her, but you chose not to. Like myself,
you had to move on.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I grunted, knowing she was right about
that, but I still didn’t want the conniving bitch living under my roof. “Take
me to tribunal, I don’t care, just leave,” I said, walking past her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She followed me into the kitchen. “Stop
being so pig-headed, Ash. I’m good with Lily. You need me here. You can’t work
without a babysitter and I have nowhere else to go. I also love looking after the
little darling, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">unlike </i>Tiana. I
understand Lily’s not Tiana’s, but she isn’t mine either, and I treat her like
she is.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I opened the fridge, searching for a
bottle of water. “That’s cos you’re a crazy bitch, who’s tryna push herself
into my life. I’m not a substitute for my brother.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I know you’re not, Ash, and I’m not
treating you like you are.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Still holding the fridge door open, I glanced
back at her. “Stop lying, Kara, I’m not a fool. You only want me cos I look
like my bro, but unlike Dante, I’m not attracted to you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She scowled at me. “Of course you are,”
she swept a hand over her body, “look at me, I’m hot.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I didn’t reply, the woman wrong about many
things, just not that, because she<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> was </i>hot.
She reminded me of a young Marilyn Monroe with her curvy figure and long blonde
hair. Yet, unlike Norma Jean, she was far from innocent-looking. Her cold blue
eyes were calculating, always assessing what she could get out of people, or
who she could fuck as well as fuck over.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I still don’t have any interest in you,
Kara,” I replied firmly, “so do right by me, like I did right by you. I took
you in when no one else would help you, and all you’ve done is lose me the
woman I love and my son. You’re lucky you ain’t six feet under for that.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She rolled her eyes again. “You wouldn’t
hurt me, Ash, so don’t even pretend that you would. You forget I’ve known you
for a while.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I grunted, annoyed she’d called my bluff. I
turned back to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of water, almost jumping out of
my skin as she ran her long fingernails down my back.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Will you fuckin’ stop that?” I growled,
pissed she wouldn’t give up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I love it when you get angry,” she purred.
“You’re so sexy when you lose your cool.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“While you’re a sadistic bitch.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No, just horny,” she said, licking her
lips like she wanted to suck me dry. And if I let her, she’d drop to her knees
and have my cock in her mouth within seconds. I wondered what Tiana would think
if she knew how Kara was treating me. Kara was like Janus, the two-faced god.
She showed Tiana a nice, innocent side, pretending to be a mate, while coming
onto me so strong that I’d had to literally push her away more than once. I’d
met aggressive females before, but Kara made them all look like declawed
kittens, the harpy a breed of her own.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’ll only stop when you give me what I
want, Ash,” she said, winking at me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You ain’t ever riding my dick, so quit
it, Kara, it’s gettin’ old and sad,” I said, taking a swig of water.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’m not old!” she snapped,
misinterpreting my words, her English not completely up to speed. “You know I’m
younger than you. I’m not sad either, just horny. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You </i>made me that way, so fix it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I sneered at her. “Go frig yourself to pictures
of Dante cos it ain’t gonna happen.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her face hardened. “Stop talking about that
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">govno</i>!” she snapped, calling my
brother a shit in Croatian. “He abandoned me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What did’ja expect after you treated him
like crap? You kept pushing and pushing until he’d had enough.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“It’s not my fault he’s a pussy who
couldn’t handle me, whereas you...” She placed a hand on my chest. “You’re all
man. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You </i>could handle me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I removed her hand from my chest. “While
you could never handle me, so keep your hands to yourself.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Or you’ll do what precisely, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">dragi</i>?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Stop callin’ me that.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She stepped in closer. “But you <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">are</i> a dear, one that’s so fucking hot I
want to lick you all over.” She pressed up against me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I put the bottle of water down on the
bench and took hold of her shoulders, moving her to the side. “Not happening,”
I said, heading out of the kitchen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Why?” she barked. “You have no partner
now.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I stopped in the sitting room, the woman
one step behind me. “I have no interest in you, Kara. Never have and never
will. Dante and I have completely different tastes in chicks.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“But I’m every man’s taste!” she said,
both sounding and looking offended.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Not mine.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I think you’re lying, you good for
nothing man!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I laughed, the way she’d said it sounding
funny.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Don’t laugh at me! I’m the only reason
you can still work. I look after Lily, not your <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">so-called</i> taste in women. Where is Tiana?” She looked around the
lounge theatrically. “I don’t see her.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Which is hardly surprising since I split
with her.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’m still a better option than her. I
would pleasure you at night, while looking after your child during the day.
I’ll also cook you good Croatian food. Tiana can’t do any of those. She was
always whining she was tired, never lifting a finger to help you with Lily, and
I know you didn’t like her cooking.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I grimaced, most of what she’d said true.
Tiana had barely looked after Lily. I understood she didn’t want to raise another
woman’s child, but if she wanted to be with me, she had little choice, because
I wasn’t giving up my baby girl no matter how much I loved Tiana. I’d gotten
Lily’s mother pregnant while Tiana and I weren’t together, Tiana having left me
due to my drug dealing business. I’d eventually split up with Beth after I’d
found out she’d cheated on me with my brother Dante, moving back with Tiana,
giving up dealing to be with her and my now eleven-year-old son. So, when Beth
had said she was pregnant, everyone had assumed it was Dante’s baby. We’d learned
otherwise not long before Beth got hit by a car. Lily had survived, but Beth
had died, leaving me with a new-born and very little help from my partner, who
was now my ex.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You know it’s true,” Kara said, rubbing
it in. “Tiana isn’t good for you. You two were constantly arguing. Worse, you haven’t
fucked her since I moved in here.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I jerked my head back. “What the hell,
Kara? How the fuck would ja know that?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Tiana told me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Why would she tell you <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">that</i>?” I asked, annoyed that Tiana had
spoken about our sex life, or lack thereof, to someone as lecherous as Kara.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’m her friend, and she was upset that you
stopped touching her.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You’re not her friend, you’re a snake in
the grass, while I wuz tired. That happens when I’m forced to work around the
clock, then hafta come home to look after a baby, while she slept. What did she
expect?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">See</i>,
she <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">was</i> bad for your health, while
I’m good for it. I look after Lily well, allowing you to sleep.” She stepped in
closer. “I can also remedy your sexual drought, because a man as sexy as you should
have sex <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">every </i>day, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">multiple </i>times.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I sneered at her. “Fuck off.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Oh, no, I want to fuck all over you,” she
said, giving me a wicked grin. “I masturbate to thoughts of you every night.
I’d pay <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you </i>to have sex.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’m not a fuckin’ whore,” I snapped. “If
you want a ho, go pay my father. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">He’ll </i>take
your money.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her cold blue eyes sparkled. “He may be
able to make me come, but he’s not who I want.” She unzipped the front of her
top and unhooked her bra, releasing her massive tits.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“For fuck’s sake,” I snapped, turning away
from her. “Put those things away.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She moved up behind me, pressing her tits
against my back.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I spun around fast. “Stop it, Kara,” I
said, backing up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She followed me, reaching for my crotch.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I smacked her hand away. “I’m warning you,
Kara,” I growled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You’re all talk, Ash,” she said, running
her hand over my crotch.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Having had more than enough of her shit, I
grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her against the wall, getting a
startled yelp out of her. I lowered my face to hers, the chick quite a bit shorter
than me. “I’m not a nice man, Kara,” I growled low. “I’m more likely to fuck
you up than fuck you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She did a little shake, her pupils growing
big. Before I knew what was happening, she grabbed my head and yanked it down, smashing
her lips against mine. I put my hands in between us and pushed away from her,
getting a handful of tits in the process. I instantly whipped my hands away,
horrified I’d touched them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She laughed, looking pleased with herself.
“Now <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">that</i>, Ash, is what I’m talking
about.” Her eyes dropped to my crotch. “And it looks like it turned you on too,
big boy.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I covered my crotch, disgusted that I was
hard.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She took a step towards me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I backed up fast, almost falling over the
coffee table. “Keep the fuck away from me!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She placed a finger to her lips. “Shush, you’ll
wake up Lily.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I quickly moved to the side as she went
for me again. I didn’t want to touch her, but she wouldn’t stop. “My father wuz
right, I should never have let you stay ’ere.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She shook her head. “He wasn’t right
because I’m perfect for you, Ash. Unlike Tiana, I’m happy to help raise your
child. I can’t have children, so this is a perfect setup.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I sneered at her. “So, you’re after my kid.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She shook her head again. “No, I’m after<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> you</i>, Lily is just a bonus. We can be a
family.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You’re delusional.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No, I’m realistic. You need someone to
help raise Lily, I need someone to care for me, and Lily needs two parents.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You’ll never be Lily’s parent.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Step</i>
parent.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I know what you mean, and it’s not
happening. Firstly, I’m never gettin’ married, and secondly, I don’t want you,
Kara. End of story.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Not until I say so.” She reached behind
her back and unzipped her skirt, dropping it to the floor.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Stop doin’ that!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Smiling at me, she leaned forward and
shimmied out of her barely there G-string, dropping it to the floor too. Now
completely naked, she ran her hand over her clean-shaven pussy, dipping her
finger between her slit. “You can’t tell me this doesn’t turn you on,” she
said, licking her full lips, looking like she wanted to wrap them around my
cock. My cock twitched at the sight, but my mind didn’t want anything to do
with the barracuda.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Take your loose cunt and fuck off,” I growled.
“Cos I’m <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">never </i>gonna fuck it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her eyes widened, then her hand whipped
out, slapping me across the face.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I grabbed her wrist. “That’s the only time
I’ll let you hit me, Kara. Do it again, and I won’t be so nice.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Nice?</i>”
she hissed. “You aren’t fucking nice, Ash. You’re a nasty, bitter man who
refuses to see what’s good for him.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You’re not good for anyone, Kara, you’re
poison,” I said, letting go of her wrist.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She shoved my chest.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I sneered at her and took a step closer,
making her stumble back. “I ain’t Dante. I won’t let you push me around.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She sneered right back. “Don’t delude
yourself, you’re just like your brother. Even when I pushed him, he never raised
a hand to me, like you won’t. You’re too noble, Ash. You’re not your father,
you wouldn’t hurt a woman.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I glared at her. “I can still toss you out
on your fat arse.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her eyes widened. “You didn’t just say
that!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I grinned. “You bet I did.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her hand whipped out again. I caught it
before it could connect with my face and shunted her back, pushing her against
the wall again. I pressed my body against hers, causing her to inhale sharply.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“There you go,” I sneered. “You’ve got my
body against yours. Enjoy it, cos it’s all you’re gonna get.” My sneer turned
into a smile. “And here’s sumpthin’ for you to mull over, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">draga</i>. I may not be able to kill you, but I’m fine with setting Killer
onto you,” I said, mentioning my father’s ex, a hitman with multiple
personalities, three to be precise. Killer was deadly, Murderer even deadlier,
a true psychopath without a shred of empathy, while the third personality was a
teenage girl with masochistic tendencies, her name Pain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Kara inhaled sharply. “You wouldn’t!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She was right, but she didn’t need to know
that. “He’s already asked to put a bullet in your head, so don’t tempt fate.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her face dropped, Kara clearly believing
me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I sniggered, amused that I’d stunned her into
silence, not something that happened often. She was hard to shock, especially
with her rough background, my brother’s ex having survived the Bosnian War.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I let go of her and turned to the front door,
now in a good mood, getting one over Kara better than downing some uppers. Plus,
it was about time I put her in her place, something that was long overdue.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Get dressed and leave,” I said, reaching
for the door handle, hoping there was a cheque in the mail. “I want you out by
the end of the day.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I opened the door, jumping at the sight of
one of my best mates standing on my front step. L had her hand raised, looking
like she was about to knock. A stunning smile lit up her beautiful face, the
chick the complete opposite of Kara. She was so sweet, a sex kitten who had no
idea how hot she looked, and today was no different. Her perky tits were on
full display, the sunlight making her white blouse see-through, her lacy bra visible
underneath. It was why I was finding it incredibly hard to keep my eyes on her
face, even though it was a face I adored. She had stunning hazel-green eyes and
fine porcelain features, the woman a right doll, her gorgeous ginger and blonde
hair framing everything perfectly. Ever since she’d returned from Wales, I
found it hard to think of her as the kid I was friends with back in high school.
Twelve years ago, she’d looked like a pretty boy, with bright orange hair and a
less curvy figure, if you could even call it curvy now, because she was so
slim.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Hello, L!” Kara chimed behind me, making
me stiffen. I’d forgotten Kara was there, L like a breath of fresh air in a cave
filled with choking smoke.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">L’s gaze moved past me, her eyes going big
at the sight of the naked bitch at my back. “No, no, no,” L said, shaking her
head, her expression horrified. Then she was spinning around, looking like she
was about to bolt.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I grabbed her by the arm and pulled her
inside, causing her to squeal. I let go of her and shut the door so she
couldn’t escape. “It’s not what it looks like,” I said, wanting to strangle
Kara.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">L took a step away from me. “What it looks
like,” she said, her voice trembling, “is that you had sex with Kara.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I grimaced, insulted that she thought I’d
stoop that low. “I have no interest in doin’ that barracuda. Never have and
never will.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Then why is she naked!” L yelled,
thrusting a finger in Kara’s direction.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“She’s sexually harassing me, won’t take
no for a bloody answer. She thinks if she walks around naked I’ll fuck her like
Dante did. Screw that, I don’t like nasty women.” I looked back at Kara, wanting
to piss her off. “Especially ones with fat arses and fake tits.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Kara’s eyes widened. “My tits are real!”
she said, not defending her arse, the chick getting a bit too comfortable with
eating my food. Still, I’d only said it because I knew it would rile her, like
she was riling me, because I didn’t care if she was fat or thin. I liked women
of all sizes. Small arses, big arses, I had no type in that regard, only that
they were sweet-natured, like Tiana used to be and L had always been.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Kara’s sulky expression disappeared. A sly
smile replaced it, not boding well for me. She made a ticking sound, like a
snake with a forked tongue, her cold blue eyes moving to L. “He’s lying, L. He
pushed me against the wall and pressed his body against mine. Mmm, it felt sooo
good. Ash baby has one enormous cock, so big when it’s hard.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I stiffened. “Did you forget what I said ’bout
Killer?” I snapped, sick of her manipulating people.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She ran a finger over her lower lip,
giving me a smug smile. “Don’t fool yourself, Ash, you would never put Killer
on me. Despite Dante dumping me, he still loves me. If you got me killed, he’d
never forgive you, and I know you love your brother too much to do that.” She licked
her finger and lowered it to her pussy, biting her lip, looking at me like she’d
experienced my cock inside of her. She had no shame, sex not meaning the same
to her as it did to me—<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">or anyone else</i>.
She’d worked as both a porn star and a hooker, the woman used to exposing
herself to others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I turned back to L, who looked like she
believed every word Kara was saying. “She’s lying. I would never fuck her. She
ain’t my type.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Then, why did you get hard over me?” Kara
said.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I shot her a dark look over my shoulder.
“Stop tryna manipulate L into believing your bullshit. Pack and leave before I
call the cops on you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She shook her head. “You wouldn’t bring
the cops here, you hate them, plus I know where you hide your drugs. You
wouldn’t risk it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I stalked over to her, Kara backing up
fast. “This is <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">my </i>house!” I yelled at
her. “I work myself to the bone so that my daughter can live in a nice suburb,
and I will <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">not</i> tolerate you
undermining me! This is it, Kara. I want you gone by the end of the day or I’ll<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i>kill you myself!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You don’t mean that,” she said, now
looking worried, something in my expression telling her I did. The woman was able
to drive any man insane, pushing them past their limits, making them do what
they normally wouldn’t.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You know I don’t speak just to hear my
voice,” I growled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“But you said the same thing after I got
into the shower with you last night.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“She <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what</i>?!”
L yelled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I shot L an annoyed look over my shoulder,
both of the women now pissing me off. “I didn’t want her there, so stop bein’
so gullible. I got out as soon as she got in. Ever since Tiana moved out, she
won’t stop comin’ onto me. I can’t turn around without her tryna jump my bones.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Guilt flashed across L’s face. “I’m
sorry.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“The only thing you’re sorry about is that
he doesn’t want <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you</i>,” Kara spat at L.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">L flinched, looking like Kara had slapped
her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Ignore her, L,” I said. “She’s bein’ spiteful
cos she can’t get me. She knows you’re just a mate.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Kara rolled her eyes. “You’re as thick as
your brothers at times, Ash, even worse than Sledge,” she said, mentioning the
youngest one. “Totally clueless. L admitted to wanting you, hell, she even said
she loved you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Stop lying, Kara, I’ve had more than
enough of your bullshit.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Then ask L if you don’t believe me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I turned back to L. “Tell her that you
don’t want me like that.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">L wrapped her arms around her midsection
and dropped her gaze.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I frowned. “L, tell her.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She didn’t reply, just kept staring at her
booted heels.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You can’t be serious?” I said, taken
aback that Kara was telling the truth. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">L
still wanted me?</i> I’d thought she’d gotten over her high school crush years
ago.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">L looked up at me, her eyes misting over.
“You know I had a thing for you back in school, so why would it be any different
now?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“But, you told Tiana you weren’t
interested in stealing me from her, that we were just mates.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You wanted Tiana back then, so it’s not
like I had a chance of winning you, while now... You’re single and you haven’t
shown any interest in being with me other than as friends.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Cos that’s all I thought we were.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Not to me!” she cried, sounding hurt.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Then, why didn’t you say anything?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Because you could never want someone like
me.” She turned to the door, looking like she was going to bolt again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I rushed over, slamming my hand against
it, stopping her from escaping. “No, you don’t,” I barked, not letting her
startled look stop me from saying my piece, what she’d done hurting me. “All
those times you came over, pretending to be my mate, you were only ’ere cos you
wanted to fuck me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her eyes went wide. “No!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Well, it sure as hell sounds like it.
Tiana kept tellin’ me you were only hanging around cos you wanted to steal me
from her. I defended you against her, tellin’ her she wuz just bein’ paranoid,
that all you wanted wuz to be my mate, and now you’re tellin’ me that she wuz
right all along?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">L shook her head vigorously. “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">No</i>. I would never have done anything to
come between the two of you. I just wanted to be near you, that was enough for
me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Don’t lie,” Kara said. “You want all of
Ash. Admit that you were secretly hoping he would get with you after he left
Tiana.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">L swallowed, looking guilty as sin, her
silence confirming Kara’s words.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My jaw clenched. “Did you tell Tiana that
I wuz cheating on her with you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her eyes went big again. “No! I would <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">never</i> have done that. I told her that
you had no interest in me, tried to reassure her, but Kara kept feeding her lies
about me and you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Kara sniffed. “Well, you made it so damn
easy since everyone but Ash knew you loved him, correction, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">love </i>him, because you just can’t keep
away from my <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">dragi</i>.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’m not yours, Kara,” I said.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She spoke over me, “It’s why Tiana was so
easy to manipulate. If you didn’t keep coming over, L, I wouldn’t have had anything
to work with. Though, you did Ash a favour with helping me get rid of that
silly woman. She wasn’t good enough for him, never was and never will be.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Stop insulting Tiana!” I snapped, knowing
that wasn’t true. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I </i>was the one who
wasn’t good enough for Tiana, my mates pretty much spelling it out when I’d
first hooked up with her. She’d been so sweet, so perfect back in high school,
nothing like the paranoid woman she’d grown into. Being with me had tarnished
her, worn her down.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Kara shook her head at me. “No, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you</i> need to learn some home truths, Ash.
Tiana isn’t good for you on so many levels. She refused to help you with Lily,
she also refused to give you what you need: sexually, mentally, and culturally.
You should never have gotten back together the first time. You broke up for a
reason. It was inevitable that you’d break up again.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What would you know? You weren’t even ’ere
back then.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Tiana told me all about it. You forget I
became her best friend. She told me <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">everything</i>.
She mentioned about how much it hurt when you moved onto another woman whiplash
fast after she’d left, and how devastated she was when she found out you’d gotten
that same woman pregnant. She also couldn’t get over how you fought harder to
keep Lily than Angelo.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I stiffened at the mention of my son with
Tiana. “I fought damn hard to be keep him with me. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Tiana’s </i>the one who kept Angelo away.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“And what kind of person does that to someone
they supposedly love, Ash? Enlighten me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I clenched my fists. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">A person who cared more about their own feelings than mine.</i> It made
me wonder whether Tiana’s words of love were real. The second time around, she’d
pleaded with me not to break up with her, telling me that she loved me. When I
refused to back down, she took my son away, stopping me from seeing him. That
wasn’t love. That was spite.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I can see you believe me,” Kara said.
“It’s written all over your face. You know it’s over with Tiana, you’re just
finding it hard to fully let go even though <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you</i>
split with her. And I understand it hurts that you won’t get to be with your
son, but you have a baby daughter to think about now. You need to think about
Lily’s future and I’m willing to make sure it’s the best future for her, for
you, and for me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No?” she said, looking at me in
disbelief. “I’m offering you everything, Ash.” She held her arms out, clothed
only in desperation. “Why won’t you listen to reason?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“The <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">reason
</i>you’re ’ere is cos I look like the man you love. The other reason you’re ’ere
is so you can mooch offa me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You have no money, so don’t be silly, and
I’m still not after you as a substitute. I’ve always liked you, Ash.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“It doesn’t matter. Find someone else, cos
I don’t want you. All I want is to work hard so I can look after my daughter,
cos I won’t get to raise my son cos of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">your</i>
fuckin’ interference.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You can’t blame me for Tiana’s
vindictiveness. I heard she did the same thing when you two split the first
time. This is on her, not me. It’s also on L for always coming over, making
Tiana paranoid. Tiana could clearly see L loved you, I didn’t have to do hardly
anything.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I turned back to L. She was where I’d left
her, trembling by the door.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’m sorry,” she said in a small wavering
voice, accentuating her lovely Welsh accent. “Kara’s right. Tiana <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">was </i>paranoid about me. I tried to tell
her she didn’t need to be, but I couldn’t hide my feelings for you. I just
don’t understand how everyone but you could see it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Fuck!” I tugged on my hair, angry that
I’d been played.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Yes please,” Kara said.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Go away, Kara!” I yelled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Fine, you stupid man, I’ll leave.” Kara snatched
up her clothes. “You win, L. You can have him. I’m done with being rejected. I’ll
move out, find a man who’ll appreciate me.” She disappeared down the
passageway.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I returned my attention to L. She backed
up against the door, looking scared.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What the fuck, L?” I said, feeling
insulted. “Why are you lookin’ at me like I’m gonna hit you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You hate me now,” she replied, still
trembling, her eyes awash with tears.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I don’t hate you, just pissed off you
played me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She blinked rapidly, giving me a disbelieving
look. “I didn’t play you. All I’ve ever done was try to be your friend. It’s
not my fault you make that so hard.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What do ya mean by that?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I love you, but you could never love me
back.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I do love you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“As a friend.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I didn’t reply, because she was right.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Hurt crossed her face. “And I know why.
It’s because I don’t have a vagina. I understood that way back in high school.
How could I not? You never looked at me like you looked at Jenna and Tiana back
then. All I was to you was a boy. But I’m<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">
not</i> a boy, I’m not even a girl, I’m just me. And it hurts that you don’t
see that. Do you know how many people send me love letters? How many people
email me, telling me I’m the most beautiful person in the world?<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> Thousands</i>,” she said, not lying, her
fan base enormous.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She continued, “Yet the one man I want can’t
see what they see.” She swiped at her tears. “Don’t you think I’m attractive at
all?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Of course you’re attractive, you’re
beautiful.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her face went slack. “You think I’m
beautiful?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’d be blind if I didn’t.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She took a step closer to me, hope filling
her eyes. “Beautiful enough to want me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“L...” I breathed out. “Please, can we not
go there.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She tensed. “Why? Because I don’t have a
vagina? I can get one. I’ve just been putting off the surgery, but I can make
it happen, if you want.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“It shouldn’t be what <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I</i> want. You do that for yourself, not me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“But I want you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“L...”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Don’t L me!” she snapped, jolting me, her
raised voice unusual. She was usually a timid li’l thing, barely saying boo. “You
either want me or you don’t.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“It’s not like that between us.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Because you can’t get past what I was
born with,” she said, indicating to her crotch. “Do you think it’ll make you
gay for wanting me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Don’t be ridiculous.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What’s so ridiculous about that? You
admitted I’m beautiful, yet you never made a move on me after you split with
Tiana.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“It’s been barely a week, and I thought we
were just friends.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“So, I’m friend-zoned forever?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I didn’t reply, not knowing what to say
without her thinking I was insulting her. And it wasn’t as though I hadn’t
thought about being with her in the past, I <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">had</i>,
but right now I wasn’t in the right headspace to deal with what she wanted from
me. I had so much on my plate, so much stress weighing me down, I didn’t need
to add more to it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She shook her head at me. “I can’t keep
doing this, I’m done. Have a good life, Ash.” She turned to the door.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I slammed my hand against it yet again.
“You’re not leaving.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She bunched up her hands and turned
around, glaring up at me. “Why? You admitted I’m not good enough for you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I didn’t say that. Hell, L, you’re far
too good for an arsehole like me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No, I’m not, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you’re</i> too good for <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">me</i>,
have always been out of my league.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Stop putting yourself down.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“How can I not with the way you treat me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I treat you good.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Not in the way I want. And it’s because
of this,” she said, touching her crotch.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I dropped my gaze to it, knowing I
wouldn’t see anything. She was flat as a pancake down there, her dick closer to
the size of a large clit. I’d seen it in high school when Ant Torres had pulled
her pants down in the locker room. She didn’t even have balls, just puffiness
around her clit... dick, whatever it was, because I wasn’t sure.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You won’t see anything no matter how hard
you stare,” she said, drawing my attention back to her face. “My dick is so
small that Ant called it a clitoris.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I stiffened at the mention of Ant, the
sick fuck having raped L, and more than once. It was how L and I had first
connected, the both of us having been raped at the same age. As a result, we’d
made a suicide pact, planning on drowning together. I’d changed my mind at the
last minute when I saw her panicking in the water, gasping for air, fear making
her fight for her life. But she was too weak to keep above the surface, so I’d
tried to help her, but she’d kept panicking, wearing me out, the both of us
almost drowning. And we would’ve if it wasn’t for my coach rushing into the
water with one of my friends, my coach saving me, Joel saving L.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Did Ant contact you?” I asked.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She shook her head. “No, he used to say it
when we were younger.” She bit her lip, looking uncertain. “Do you want to see
it?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“See what?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She indicated to her groin. “You know what
I’m talking about.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I took a step back. “What the fuck, L?<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> No</i>.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Then, what about my breasts?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No, L, I don’t wanna see ’em either.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Then, why do you stare at them when you
don’t think I’m looking? Dante’s right, you send me mixed signals all the time,
making me believe being with you could be possible.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“When the fuck did the bastard say that?”
I snapped, sick of my brother always sticking his nose into my business.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“He says it all the time. And you want to
know why he says it? Because it’s true.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I grimaced, feeling ashamed she’d noticed
me looking. “I like tits, okay, and you have a perfect pair.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her lips parted, a gasp escaping. “You really
think they’re perfect?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I indicated to them. “Well, they are.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her bottom lip trembled. “Do you want to
look at them?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I already said no. What has gotten into
you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You</i>,
Ash. This is out in the open now. We need to deal with this or you need to deal
with me not being in your life.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I screwed up my face, not wanting to lose
her friendship. “That’s not fair, L, you can’t do that to me. You’re one of my
best mates.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I need more than just friendship.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You were fine with things until today.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I was never fine with it!” she snapped, a
flush of red spreading up her neck. “It hurt being around you, Ash. Hurt so
bad. But I couldn’t stop coming around. I love you, and if there’s even a
remote chance I could get you, I have to try.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I didn’t reply, not knowing what to say to
that. I might have thought about doing things with her, even being with her,
but to actually step over that boundary, changing from friends to lovers... It
wasn’t just a line in the sand, it was a massive leap, making it impossible to
return to what we had before. I could lose her completely if I fucked up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Ash,” she said, stepping up to me. “You
said I’m beautiful. We’re close friends. Can’t we try to see if we can make it
as partners?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My gaze shifted to the drawing I’d done of
Tiana, which also included my son, the picture hanging on my wall. Getting with
L wouldn’t just jeopardise our friendship, it would give Tiana even more of a
reason to stop me from seeing my son. She’d accuse me of lying to her again,
telling me she knew she was right, that I <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">had</i>
cheated on her with L. And although I hadn’t, getting with L so quick wouldn’t
prove my case.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You still love, Tiana,” L said, “don’t
you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I turned my attention back to her. She was
looking at the same picture, defeat written all over her face. “Yes,” I said,
not watering it down for her, although it hadn’t been why I’d been looking at
the picture. “I have since I wuz fifteen.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">L exhaled a shaky breath. “While I’ve
loved you since <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I </i>was fifteen. Please
give me a chance, Ash.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I didn’t reply, not knowing what to do. I
didn’t want to hurt her, but I’d only just broken up with Tiana. “Fuck!” I
said, spinning around, unable to deal with this anymore. I bolted down the
passage and into my room, closing the door behind me, needing to escape from
all the women pressuring me to do shit I didn’t want to.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I slumped down onto my bed and put my head
in my hands, not knowing which way was up or down, L having turned my world completely
on its arse. I didn’t want to lose her as a friend, but this was too soon after
my breakup with Tiana, not to mention too strange to deal with. I’d put L in
the friend pocket, safe, always there, a person I could talk to without the
complications that came with a relationship.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The door opened, drawing my attention to
it. L stepped into my room, looking terrified, yet resolute. She closed the
door behind her, her eyes not leaving me...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">...as
she started to undo her blouse buttons.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<br /></div>
<br /><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>If you wish to continue reading <i>Ashes to Ashes</i> it's </b><b>available on Amazon</b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Ashes-Marita-Hansen-ebook/dp/B07Z1K1DD3">Amazon US</a></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-66483313356230685532019-09-26T03:19:00.000-07:002019-09-26T03:19:31.311-07:00ASHES TO ASHES' FINAL BLURB IS ON GOODREADS<div style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px;">
Ashes to Ashes</div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; margin-top: 6px;">
by Marita A. Hansen</div>
<div style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; margin-top: 6px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; display: inline; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;">
<div style="font-family: inherit; margin-bottom: 6px;">
L Davies has been besotted with Ash Rata ever since he walked into her high school class twelve years ago. She just never thought he'd be interested in her, due to her being intersex. Mistakenly brought up as a boy, L has transformed over the years into a stunning woman, and has accumulated a devoted following after becoming the lead guitarist for Ash's brother, the infamous Dante. But although she has a legion of fans, all she wants is Ash, loving him unconditionally, yet resigned to being friend-zoned forever. Until, out of frustration and desperation, she takes Dante's advice, stripping for Ash, both literally and emotionally, baring her soul to him, desperate for his acceptance and love.</div>
<div style="font-family: inherit; margin-bottom: 6px; margin-top: 6px;">
Clueless to L's infatuation, Ash is left dumbstruck by her advances. Although he loves L as a friend, he soon realises there's more behind his feelings than simple friendship. After he gives in to those feelings, allowing L to seduce him, he quickly discovers that his moment of weakness wasn't private, his boarder having installed hidden cameras in his room. The sex tape is uploaded onto the internet and goes viral. The media frenzy that ensues throws Ash into the limelight, one that's intent on ripping him and L apart, as well as losing him access to his son, his ex using their eleven-year-old as a means to win him back. Though, Ash's ex becomes the least of his worries when a monster from his and L's past walks back into their lives.</div>
<div style="font-family: inherit; margin-bottom: 6px; margin-top: 6px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-family: inherit; margin-bottom: 6px; margin-top: 6px;">
*Publication date to come:</div>
<div style="font-family: inherit; margin-bottom: 6px; margin-top: 6px;">
<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/13550145-ashes-to-ashes">Ashes to Ashes Goodreads' Link</a></div>
</div>
Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-66244140620555073322019-09-17T15:55:00.002-07:002019-09-17T15:55:17.687-07:00News About ASHES TO ASHES<span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;">I have FINALLY emailed the last chapters to my editor. I'd hoped to have had them done prior to my surgery, but I just couldn't do it on time, mostly because I added about 10 more pages to the book. Anyway, it's completed, so now I just have to get into the mode of proofreading the book, which is a painful process, one I hate doing since I go over and over and OVER the book countless times, making sure there aren't any errors (even though those pes</span><span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; display: inline; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;">ky things still manage to slip through). Regardless, it's the final stage, meaning it's not long away from being published. I did intend on publishing it in September, and probably can still do so if I push myself, but I doubt my brain will allow that to happen since it's on slow mo mode at the moment (due to recovering from the op). So, sorry, expect it to come out early October now. It would've definitely been September if it weren't for my operation, and even months earlier if it weren't for financial issues, but I can finally see the end, so it's only a few weeks away now. And if things progress faster than expected I will publish it sooner. I still haven't decided on a publication date, but expect to see one VERY soon.</span>Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-44421897443103528252018-11-24T01:37:00.000-08:002018-11-24T01:37:15.339-08:00LOVE HATE LOVE Sample<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-align: center; text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><o:p><b><i>LOVE HATE LOVE </i></b></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><o:p><b><i>SAMPLE</i></b></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><o:p><b><i>#NA #CollegeRomance #UniversityRomance </i></b></o:p></span><b style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 12pt; text-indent: 0.3pt;"><i>#MentalIllness #TurbulentLove</i></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><br /></span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;">This
book is set in 2005 and 2006.</span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; text-indent: .3pt;">
<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;">~
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="One">1</a> ~<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I didn’t want to be here, felt <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">way</i> out of my comfort zone. It wasn’t for
me, wasn’t the kind of thing I did. Unfortunately, it was <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">exactly </i>what my best friend would do, a friend who was right now
shaking with excitement at the thought of entering the strip joint, or in her
words, ‘the male review’.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Why do they call it that?” I asked Julia.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My best friend turned to look up at me.
Even in her six-inch heels, she was still a couple of inches shorter. Though, I
was tall for a girl at five ten, or what Julia called, ‘model height’, which was
why I usually wore flats since I was always self-conscious of being taller than
guys.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What are you talking about?” Julia asked,
stopping in the cloakroom to hand over her white leather jacket.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“A <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">review</i>,”
I answered. “What’s there to review? The way the guys shake their butts? Or the
size of their willies?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia barked out a laugh. “Not a review,
dummy, a <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">revue</i>,” she said, spelling
it out. “Now, hand over your jacket to the... mmm... rather <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">nice</i> man.” She ran her tongue over her
teeth, giving the bare-chested guy behind the counter a flirty wink. He was
wearing a black, silky apron with the name <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Molly’s
</i>printed across the nether regions, his rather impressive torso making me
blush. I wondered how I was going to handle watching guys pump and grind in
even less if I couldn’t even handle the cloakroom guy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I quickly handed my jacket over to him, getting
a ticket in return. He gave Julia a cheeky smile, clearly having heard what
she’d said about him, then turned around to hang up our jackets, giving us a
whole different kind of cheekiness. His arse was barer than my uncle’s bald
head, minus the shine, though he had a lipstick tattoo on his right butt cheek.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia giggled, while her older sister—who
was wearing a white veil for her hen night—told him she’d love to give him a
matching kiss on his other cheek. The man didn’t respond, other than to take
another woman’s jacket, probably used to a whole lot more than what Katie had
said.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Feeling embarrassed, I grabbed Julia’s arm
and pulled her through the doorway that led into the main room. The space was much
brighter than I expected, the disco balls above our heads sending shards of
light everywhere, making me think of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Saturday
Night Fever. </i>I could just imagine John Travolta strutting out on stage,
thrusting his finger up in the air to the cheers of women yelling, ‘Get them
off!’ And there were a lot of women filling the space, from short to tall,
skinny to fat, young and old. I was probably one of the youngest since I was
eighteen, though Julia was even younger at seventeen, her fake I.D. working a
treat to get her in.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">A waiter holding an empty tray, and
dressed in the same black apron as the cloakroom man, slipped past Julia,
capturing her attention. It was as though he was holding an invisible string, yanking
Julia’s head around to follow his bare arse.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Jules</i>,”
I said, tugging on her hand. “We’ll lose your sister if you keep stopping to
look at every male butt.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Worth</i>
it,” she sighed, giving me a smile brighter than the tacky disco ball above our
heads—something that might’ve looked great in 1975, but not 2005.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Anyway, I know where our seats are,” she
added.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She entwined our fingers and pulled me
through the throng of women and a few men, who looked just as excited as the
women, a couple of them as camp as Liberace. The show was undeniably popular, the
wall-to-wall throng of people not what I’d expected for a tacky strip joint
that was hidden in a side-alley off K Road. And it wasn’t just middle-class
women filling it either, some of the patrons dressed to the nines—like Julia.
My best friend always dressed to impress, and she did look great, her sleek white
dress matching her even sleeker blonde hair that was smoothed back into a high
ponytail, or what she called a ‘power’ ponytail, something she said all the stars
wore, and since she was a star she should wear it too. I’d laughed at that
comment, saying that her ‘daddy’ calling her a star didn’t mean she was one.
She’d lifted her chin up in a haughty fashion, declaring that she was a star in
her own right since she’d been in a Herald article about New Zealand’s young
elite society. I’d held back from reminding her that she’d only been in there
because her dad was one of the richest men in the country.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She tugged me towards the stage, where Katie
and her group of friends were already seated in the front row, the Jachmanns
always getting the best seats.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia sat down in the chair next to her
sister, leaving me the aisle seat. “I hope you’ve got a stack of ten-dollar
bills,” she said a bit too loudly, her grin pretty much telling me where I’d be
stuffing them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“It better not be <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">that </i>kind of show,” I said, not wanting to waste money on a
stripper, especially since I needed every penny for university.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia didn’t have the same worries as I
did. Unlike her parents, mine weren’t paying for me since they were no longer
in my life, and even if they were, they couldn’t have afforded it. Only my
uncle was wealthy, and I was too proud to take the handout he’d offered me. I’d
turned it down, pretending that my Fine Arts scholarship would cover
everything. It was a lie, since it only covered board and my university fees,
not extending to food and other necessities. It was why I was being so frugal
with my money, needing every penny from the fast food job I’d acquired a few
days ago. Julia had gaped at me in horror when I’d told her about the job,
thinking I was mad for lowering myself to... What did she say? I couldn’t
remember, but it hadn’t been very flattering, highlighting just how elitist she
could be. And when she’d learned that I’d turned down my uncle’s money, she’d
told me off, basically calling me an idiot. She just didn’t understand that I
didn’t feel right about taking money from him. Nor did she understand that I wanted
to survive on my own, instead of taking handouts from someone who was only
offering because he felt obliged to.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The music changed from a slow jazzy tune to
a much faster pop beat, sending the women around us into a frenzy, everyone probably
thinking that a stripper was about to appear. But instead of a male hunk strutting
onto the stage, a bleached-blonde woman tottered out in heels that defied
gravity, making her look even skinnier. I was sure she could hide behind the
pole in the centre of the stage if it weren’t for her fake boobs, because those
two things definitely didn’t look like Mother Nature had played a part in
making them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She raised her free hand to quieten down
the women. “Welcome, ladies!” She laughed. “And a few gents.” She waved at them
with her fingers, clearly knowing the guys. “You’re all in for a real treat
tonight, with some sweet young things ready to strip for your pleasure.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Sweet young things?” I muttered to Julia.
“Hope they’re not going to come out dressed as schoolboys, because if they do,
I’m out of here.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Don’t be stupid,” she said, elbowing me,
though her broad grin lit up the room, my comment amusing her. “Anyone under
forty would be a sweet young thing to that old biddy.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“She doesn’t look that old, late forties
at a guess.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">That
</i>is old, like your taste in clothes.” She flicked the pale-green scarf
around my neck. “Take it off. If you’ve got the goods, you might as well flaunt
them.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I adjusted the silk scarf, far too shy to
take it off, my black dress not covering enough of my chest. Julia had
basically bullied me into wearing the tight little number, saying it looked,
‘Wonderful!’ And she was right, but it didn’t mean I felt comfortable wearing
it without the scarf. I almost felt like one of those eighteenth-century
damsels on a Mills & Boon cover, with my breasts doing their best to escape
the bustier—or whatever they called it back then.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The music changed again, this time rolling
into a raunchy number that I liked, but couldn’t remember the name of, my brain
not working, the anticipation starting to get to me. The rail-thin blonde
presenter raised her toothpick arms over her head and began to clap with her
microphone still in her hand, amplifying the sound. The crowd started clapping
along with her, some of the women yelling out in excitement. One of the camp
guys let out an ear-splitting wolf whistle so loud I quickly covered my ears. Julia
elbowed me, throwing a look that told me to clap along with everyone else. I
did, feeling stupid for doing it, just not wanting to feel out of place even
more than I already did.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">A girl across the row from us started
stomping her feet on the ground, setting off more women doing it. She looked
about my age, very pretty, with gorgeous gypsy-like earrings that hung down to
her bare shoulders, the straps on her red dress almost non-existent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The presenter hollered, drawing my
attention back to her. “And here he is!” She moved to the side, sweeping her
arm out for whoever <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">he </i>was. The audience
went crazy, cheering for the stripper<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i>to
come out on stage. And <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">he </i>did, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">oh</i>, he <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">certainly</i> did.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My mouth dropped open at the man
sauntering onto the stage. He was dressed in black leather-like pants and a biker
jacket over a white singlet. But it wasn’t his clothes and confident swagger
that sent the women into a frenzy. Simply put...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He
was drop-dead gorgeous.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He was young, eighteen or nineteen at a
guess, with a face that looked like it belonged on a fashion magazine rather in
a tacky strip joint. He also looked a touch too sweet to be a stripper, no
hardened features staring out at the crowd, just innocence dressed in fake
leathers. But that innocence was clearly an illusion, because the sweet visage
vanished as a wicked grin swept across his face, his sinful lips looking like
they’d kissed many girls—and their mothers too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He stopped by the pole, sweeping the soft
curls off his face. His hair was brown, just highlighted with golden hues. It
looked like the sun had kissed it as well as his skin, his golden-brown tan
suggesting he surfed rather than rode a Harley.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia gasped, “Oh. My. God. He’s <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">beautiful</i>,” she said, stating the
obvious.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The music merged into another song I knew,
but couldn’t remember the name of either, the stripper killing all of my brain
cells—and decimating my ovaries at the same time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He leaned his back against the pole in a
languid, self-assured fashion, jutting out his groin. He toyed with his pants
zipper, giving the screaming crowd a cheeky wink.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Get them off, already!” Julia’s sister hollered,
setting Julia off into a fit of giggles.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The stripper removed his hand from the
zipper and opened up his leather jacket, lifting up his white singlet to show
us a teasing peek of his torso, and it was one I definitely wanted to see more
of, his stomach ripped.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’d love to lick that six-pack,” Julia said,
breaking out into another fit of giggles.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The stripper lowered his singlet and
closed his jacket, holding it together as he sauntered towards the front of the
stage, stopping to open his jacket once more.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Take it off!” Julia’s sister hollered
louder, her friends seconding that, the women not shy, the rich girls used to
getting what they wanted.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The stripper slipped one side off, slow
and sexy, treating us to the other side next. He threw the jacket to the side
of the stage, revealing a line tattoo circling the middle of his right forearm.
There was writing above it, the words illegible from where I was sitting. He
also had another tattooed line circling his left wrist, this one thicker, with
words both above and under it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Feet started stomping for him to hurry up,
the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">tease</i> dominating the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">strip </i>part of the<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i>show. He raised a brow at the impatient hollers and lifted his
singlet up, then lowered it down, raising his other hand as though he was
asking us to shout louder. And Julia most certainly did, getting right into the
swing of things, hollering, “Off! Off! Off!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The stripper looked Julia’s way, giving
her a smile, then in one swift move the singlet came off, revealing his naked
torso, making the crowd go wild. Then, in the blink of an eye, he did a backflip,
landing on his hands. He lowered himself into a breakdancing move, basically
humping the floor. For a moment, I wondered what it would be like to be lying
underneath him as he did that, causing me to flush at the thought.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Then he was back on his feet, jerking and
moving his hips to the music, drawing closer to where I was sitting, so close that
I could see the seams up the side of his shiny fake-leather pants. I soon found
out that the seams weren’t purely for keeping his pants together when he ripped
them off, revealing muscular thighs and a rather large bulge hidden beneath a
jockstrap, making my own eyes bulge.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He turned to face away from us, revealing
his naked butt, the black elastic of the jockstrap running above and under it, emphasising
his <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">ass</i>ets even more.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia put her fingers in her mouth and let
rip with an ear-splitting wolf-whistle that her ‘daddy’ would most definitely
not think was becoming of her. The stripper turned his head in her direction, but
instead of his eyes landing on Julia, they landed on me. That wicked smile
returned. Horrified he thought I’d whistled at him, I shrank in my seat, so
embarrassed I could die.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia’s sister hollered, “Shake that booty!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">And he did, all the while looking at me. I
covered my eyes, now too embarrassed to watch. A thump made me uncover them.
The stripper was standing next to me, all that naked flesh hovering over me. He
was tall, just over six foot at a guess, and perfectly proportioned, the cut of
his body mouth-watering to say the least. I basically gaped up at him, not
knowing what to do, let alone think—unlike Julia. She reached past me, running
her hand down his abs. Before she could go even lower, he picked me up, chair
and all. I let out a shriek and grabbed around his neck, worried he was going
to drop me, because I was far from light, my curvy figure closer to Marilyn
Monroe’s than Kate Moss’s.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He lifted my chair onto the stage, causing
me to let go of him. He then hoisted himself back up onto the stage and grabbed
my chair, carrying me away from the edge. I could hear Julia and the rest of
the hen party yelling out things, but I was in too much shock to understand a
single word they were saying.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He placed my chair down and shimmied my
dress up my legs before I’d realised what he’d done, the way he was looking at
me so distracting. But I most certainly noticed when he jerked my legs apart,
another shriek following. Grinning in response, he moved in between my legs and
placed a finger under my chin, lifting it so I looked directly into his eyes.
They were the freakiest eyes I’d ever seen. His right iris was a moss green,
with hints of brown around the pupil, while his left one had the same brown
hints, just with blue instead of green surrounding it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Not taking his eyes off me, he backed up a
bit and snapped my legs shut, then climbed onto my lap. I almost choked as he
lifted my hands to his arse, yet I kept them there as though he’d superglued my
palms to his bare flesh. Then he started grinding against me, his arse cheeks
clenching beneath my hands, knocking my pulse rate out of the park, sending it
to the heavens.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He wrapped a hand around my long brown
hair and pulled my head back, forcing me to look up at him while he continued
to grind against me, the way his jockstrap was filling out telling me he was
enjoying his job a bit too much.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He let go of my hair and adjusted himself,
then removed my hands from his arse, which I hadn’t realised were still there, too
distracted by his intense stare. He climbed off me and dropped to the floor,
doing another breakdancing move, then was back up on his feet, gyrating his
crotch in front of my face. My eyes widened, because I could see the tip of his
cock trying to escape the confines of his jockstrap. He gave me a knowing smile
before adjusting himself once more, covering his cock, though I could still see
its outline clear as day.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">With my eyes locked on his package, I didn’t
see his next move coming. In the blink of an eye his hands shot out, shoving my
chair, causing me to let out a loud cry of fright as I tipped over backwards. But
he caught the chair in a move I couldn’t quite comprehend, using it to do a
flip over me, catching me on the other side.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I stared up at him as he looked down at me,
that wicked smile of his morphing into a serious expression. He lowered his
head and planted a kiss on my lips, knocking the breath out of me. His tongue
swept between my lips, sneaking into my mouth. Forgetting where I was, I
tangled my tongue with his, losing myself in the kiss.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Then his lips were gone, just like that. I
gasped as he pushed my chair back up into its correct position, the suddenness
of it all leaving my head spinning. He picked me up, placing my chair on the
edge of the stage, doing a backflip into the aisle to a very rowdy and rude
applause. He picked me up again, returning me and my chair to our original
position next to Julia. He winked at me, then climbed back up onto the stage,
blowing kisses to the crowd of screaming horny men and women. Then he turned
away from us, removing his jockstrap, setting the room on fire, the audience
going nuts. He threw the jockstrap over his shoulder and turned around to face
us, covering his crotch with both hands. He backed up slowly, grinning as he
did it. As he reached the back of the stage he lifted his hands for the briefest
of moments, flashing us, then he was gone, disappearing behind the red
curtains.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The audience yelled out, demanding that he
return, but instead of the stripper the blonde presenter appeared, walking
toward the stripper’s discarded jockstrap. She picked it up with a dirty smile,
waving it in front of her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Did you love Nico?!” she shouted into her
microphone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">A collective “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Yeees!</i>” bounced off the walls like bullets ricocheting everywhere.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia started yelling, “Bring him back!
Bring him back!” which set off the other women in the hen party, causing a
domino effect, everyone but me joining in.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The presenter waggled her finger at us as
though we were naughty school girls. “No, no, no, lovely ladies and gents, you
tired my poor Nico out. The sweet young thing needs his beauty rest. But we
have more lovely men for your entertainment.” She swept her arm out. “Like
Danny!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">An Italian-looking male strutted out onto
the stage as though he thought he was every woman’s wildest dream. The audience
welcomed him with cheers as he started pumping and grinding to the music, but
my mind remained on Nico, all the strippers coming after him poor comparisons.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
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<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; text-align: center; text-indent: .3pt;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;">~
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="Two">2</a> ~<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I stood just inside the door of my new
apartment, sizing it up. There was a single bed tucked into the far right-hand
corner by the window, with a circular table separating it from a tiny kitchen,
and hopefully enough space for my drawing board. There was also a TV at the
foot of the bed and a couch across from it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I rolled my luggage over to the bed as a
girl with wild orange hair appeared through a doorway next to the kitchen. She
smiled at me with a stoned expression, her eyelids half closed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Kia
ora,” </i>she said, saying hello in Māori, just with a heavy Scottish accent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Hi,” I said back, holding up the key I’d
gotten from the student accommodation reception. “I’m your new flatmate. Kady
Janeway.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“As in Star Trek?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I refrained from rolling my eyes, getting
that a lot. “Yes, like Captain Janeway.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Weel, welcome, Captain,” she said, giving
me a crooked grin, her green eyes now wide open, no longer looking stoned. I wondered
whether I’d woken her up, even though it was a bit late in the day for her to
be sleeping since it was almost two in the afternoon. But then again, it<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> was</i> Saturday. For all I knew, she
could’ve partied well into the night, university parties supposedly wild.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Am Annabelle,” she said, holding out a freckled
hand that looked like it had never seen the light of day. Her face was also
covered in freckles, but instead of looking bad, they made her look adorable.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I shook her hand. “Kady.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her grin grew. “Ye already said that.” She
let go of my hand and indicated to the front door with a thumb. “Am aboot to
grab a late lunch, ye want to come with me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Sure,” I said, my stomach growling, my
breakfast comprising of a cup of coffee. I’d been more concerned with moving into
the student accommodation than eating, though there hadn’t been much to move,
all of my belongings packed into two suitcases and one backpack. The only things
that weren’t here yet were my drawing board, big case of art supplies, and
desk, which my uncle had arranged for some movers to bring over later today.
He’d been too busy to bring them over himself, though even if he hadn’t been,
he still probably wouldn’t have brought them. He was a powerful entrepreneur, someone
who snapped his fingers and got other people to do what he considered beneath
him. It was why I was so glad to be away from him, his snobbery always rubbing
me up the wrong way. But I was even more glad to be away from my auntie who was
an even bigger snob. And that was why I would’ve happily traded the roomy pool
house I’d been living in for the past three years for the small student
apartment without even thinking twice. Plus, I’d earned it through my
scholarship, which made me pump out my chest in pride, knowing that I’d gotten a
place without my uncle’s help.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I followed Annabelle out of the apartment,
heading down a noisy corridor of students. A couple of them were throwing a
rugby ball over our heads, while others were moving into their own rooms, a few
with their parents.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Not interested in watching happy families,
I walked past them fast, descending the staircase with Annabelle instead of
taking the lift. Our unit was on the second level of a towering peaches and
cream building, which had peaked rooves and was broken up by rows of grey
louvres. We headed through the courtyard, passing a group of Asian students
bouncing a basketball between themselves, and stepped out onto the small side-road.
The tantalising smell of kebab and pizza tickled my nose, enticing me to the
fast food places lining the road, but Annabelle continued onwards, causing my
stomach to protest loudly. She gave me an amused smile as the road opened up
onto one of the city centre’s main streets. Our campus was in the middle of
Auckland, businesses and the university sharing the same urban space.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Annabelle started chatting about all the
best food places as we walked towards the main campus, the girl obviously
knowing Auckland well.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“How long have you been living in New Zealand?”
I asked, stopping momentarily at a pedestrian crossing that was directly across
the road from a marae. Behind the triangular entrance, with a stylised Māori
face at its apex, was a courtyard that led to a <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">wharenui. </i>The Māori meeting house was decorated with more
traditional carvings and framed by trees, an urban landscape of buildings
spreading out behind it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’ve been ’ere for a few years,”
Annabelle answered. “I lived oot in Wera with ma uncle.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“That’s in South Auckland, isn’t it?” I
asked, not really that familiar with the area, other than what Julia had told
me about it. She’d basically ordered me to stay well clear of the place, the
words <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">gangs </i>and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">poor people </i>leaving her snobby mouth, which meant that she probably
wouldn’t like my hometown either. Some people called Kaikohe an eighties
version of South Auckland. I didn’t know whether it was true, and hadn’t felt
the urge to see if it was, though it did make me question why I was friends
with Julia. But her loving side outweighed her snobbish side, leaving me feeling
guilty for questioning our friendship.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Annabelle nodded in reply to my question
as we headed over another crossing. We walked past a large building that merged
with a recreation centre, Annabelle telling me it was a student one. She
steered me left, back to talking about food as we ascended a flight of stairs
and crossed a quad, the Maths and Science block on our left.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Why couldn’t we just get something from
our road?” I asked, still thinking about pizza and kebabs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“It’s cheaper ’ere, plus there’s more
choice,” she said, leading me through a short walkway that led to a cafeteria
on our left. “Nae to mention I loove the pancakes ’ere. I could live off ’em.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Someone called out her name. She stopped
in her tracks, a massive smile lighting up her freckled face. I turned to see
who it was, my eyes widening as it landed on...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The
male stripper I’d watched two weeks ago..<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Nico!” Annabelle called out loudly,
making a beeline for him. He was seated in the far corner, boxed in by a pretty
brunette who had long, straight hair just like mine. Though, she had much
fairer skin, reminding me of a porcelain doll, her complexion flawless.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Annabelle stopped by his table. “Long time
no see.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“If you call a week a long time, I guess
so.” Smiling with amusement, he pushed to his feet, his mismatched blue and
green eyes turning to me, the brown in the centre not as noticeable in
daylight.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I flushed at his attention, praying he
didn’t remember me, even though I could never forget him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The brunette nudged Nico’s leg with an
elbow. “Aren’t you going to introduce me?” she practically demanded, a sour
expression pulling at her glossy pink lips.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Nico took a step away from her as though
he didn’t want her touching him. “This is my cousin,” he said, indicating to
Annabelle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Annabelle rolled her eyes. “Jus’ ’cause ma
uncle married yer auntie disnae make us cousins. Plus, they’re divorced now,
which doubly means we’re nae cousins, ye numpty.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He laughed, his mismatched eyes twinkling
at her. “Still calling you my cuz, babes.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“If ye call me <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">babes </i>again, I’ll plant ma foot up yer arse.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He laughed louder, his smile lighting up
his whole face. He turned that smile on me, burning my cheeks with its
brightness. “Who’s this?” he asked, taking in more than I felt comfortable with,
his gaze lingering slightly too long on my chest.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Someone ye’re nae allowed to touch.”
Annabelle swung her arm over my shoulders, having to reach up a bit to get
there. “Ma roommate’s off limits, ’cause there’s no way am listening to ye
humping in ma flat.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Hey!” the pretty brunette said loudly, complaining
before I could. “Nico won’t be humping anyone but <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">me</i>. He’s <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">my </i>boyfriend, so
keep your greedy eyes off him,” she said, directing the last line at me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I wasn’t—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Annabelle cut me off, “Nico’s everyone’s
boyfriend, so ye better get used to it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The brunette snapped her head to Nico.
“Tell her that’s not true.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He sat back down. “It’s not,” he said,
picking up the sub off his tray.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The brunette waved a hand at Annabelle in
victory. “See!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Nico spoke over her. “Because I don’t have
girlfriends.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her head whipped back to him. “But <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’m </i>your girlfriend.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I wouldn’t let you be my girlfriend even
if you paid me a million bucks,” he said, taking a bite out of his sub.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Don’t say that!” she snapped, shoving his
arm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He jerked away from her, throwing the girl
a nasty glare. “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Don’t</i> touch me,” he
growled, swallowing down the bite of food.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“But—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No buts! You shove me, you can shove
off.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What the hell, Nico! What’s gotten into
you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You</i>.
Just because I fucked you doesn’t make you my girlfriend.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The girl’s face fell. “But—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Just piss off! I’ve had enough of you
following me around like a stalker.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her hand whipped out, slapping him across
the face. He dropped his sub on his tray and shot to his feet, the suddenness
causing the girl to shriek.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I told you not to touch me!” he yelled.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She pushed to her feet and backed up fast,
looking unsure of what to do and more than a touch scared. “You said—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Nothing</i>.
It’s not my fault you live in a fantasy world. I told you the deal and you
agreed to it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She burst into tears and grabbed her bag,
taking off.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“That was <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">nasty</i>,” Annabelle said, shaking her head at him. “And <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">totally </i>unnecessary.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He grimaced. “She was getting on my
nerves, the slap was the last straw.” His eyes moved to me as though I’d
slapped him instead of the brunette. “And why do you look familiar. Did I fuck
you too?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My eyes widened. “No!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">A small smile replaced his angry
expression. “True, I would’ve remembered someone like you.” His eyes ran over
me again, firing up my cheeks once more.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Annabelle exhaled. “Please be nice, Nico.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">His gaze shifted back to her. “I’m always
nice, Annie.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“On the rare occasion, and dinnae call me
Annie, ye damn weel know I hate it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Not my fault you have orange hair.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He sat back down and picked up his sub,
biting into it as though nothing bad had happened.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Annabelle slipped into the seat across
from him, muttering, “What have ye got planned today?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Instead of answering her, his eyes flicked
to a sparrow as it flew down to a spot a few feet away from him, pecking at the
crumbs on the floor. Swallowing his food, he broke off a piece of bread from
his sub and threw it to the sparrow. The sparrow went for it, picking it up in its
beak and flying out the door. Nico’s eyes followed it, a small smile tugging at
his lips.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Earth to Nico,” Annabelle said, rapping
the table in front of him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">His eyes shifted back to her, almost looking
startled as if he’d forgotten she was there. “What?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I asked what ye’ve got planned today.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Just getting stuff ready for the start of
uni.” He took another bite of the sub.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She reached out, swiping it off him. He
let her, watching as she took a bite out of it before handing it back.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He held it out to me. “You wanna steal my
lunch, too?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I shook my head, wishing I could leave
instead, the guy making me feel deeply uncomfortable.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Good, not like I have the cash,” he said,
flicking Annabelle an annoyed look, “to give my food away.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Annabelle grinned wide, a piece of lettuce
stuck in her teeth. “I’ll make it up to ye.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“With a roast dinner.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Ye pay for it, I’ll cook it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“But you can’t cook.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Looks like ye’ll be paying for it <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">and </i>cooking it, then.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He laughed, then looked up at me. “You
going to sit or what?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I quickly slipped in next to Annabelle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He frowned at me. “You really look
familiar. You sure we haven’t met before?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I shook my head, not willing to tell him
that he’d ground his near naked body against me while I’d stared at the tip of
his cock. I swallowed at the thought, hoping that my blush hadn’t spread down
my neck, the guy worse than an infection.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What’s your name?” he asked, not letting
up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“It’s Kady Janeway,” Annabelle answered
for me, “as in Captain Janeway.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Nico smiled, displaying a perfect row of
pearly whites. “Nice to meet ya, Captain,” he said, holding out his free hand
to shake.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I hesitated for a moment, getting a raised
brow in response. I quickly lifted my hand and shook his, gasping as he jerked
me forward, placing his face right in front of mine.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Maybe I was drunk when I did you,” he
said. “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Shame.</i> I’d like to remember
that night.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I jerked my hand free, what he’d said
making my back stiffen, all embarrassment gone, annoyance now reigning in its
place. “I don’t sleep around, and especially not with people who drink.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">His eyebrows shot up higher. “Is it
because you’re a Mormon or something?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No, I just hate alcohol and what it does
to people.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Why?” he asked, looking at me
inquisitively with those strange, but beautiful eyes of his. It was almost as
though he was peering into my soul, shifting through my Pandora’s box of
emotions to see why I’d reacted so strongly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“It’s none of your business,” I replied.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He leaned back in his seat, resting one of
his arms over the back of it. “Guess you’re right, it isn’t my biz.” He cocked
his head to the side. “Though, I’d like it to be. You free tonight?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What did I jus’ say all of a minute ago?”
Annabelle asked.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Nico’s eyes shifted back to her. “What?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“That ye weren’t allowed to get with ma
roommate.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I only wanna talk.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Yeah, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">right</i>,
and am the pope.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Smirking, he held out his sub to her.
“Please take my small offering then, your royal majesty.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Ye know the pope is nae a queen nor a king,
ye teasing numpty,” she said, but still took the sub, the rest of it in her
mouth before he could reply.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He laughed and rose to his feet, his eyes
going to me. “I look forward to figuring out who you are...” He paused. “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Captain</i>.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I rolled my eyes at the name, annoyed it
had followed me from school to university.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">His smile turned into the same wicked grin
I’d seen the night he’d stripped, making me worry that he’d figured out where
he’d seen me. But instead of mentioning it, he spun on his heel and walked off,
disappearing through the doorway, allowing me to let out the breath I hadn’t
realised I was holding in.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“He’s quite something,” Annabelle said
with a mouthful of Nico’s sub. She swallowed it down. “Though, I warn ye, keep
away from him. He eats girls up and spits ’em oot, he’s also more than a bit
loco.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“How?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“He’s wild, does crazy things withoot
caring aboot the consequences, things that are mental. It gets him into a world
of trouble. Lucky I know a cop, otherwise he would’ve been thrown in the slammer
more than once.” She shook her head. “Numpty.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I laughed at the word, the girl amusing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She looked at me sideways. “Nothing to
laugh aboot, lassie. He looked at ye like ye’re on the menu next. Be verra careful,
he knows his way aroond getting what he wants, which is hardly surprising with
the way he looks.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I grimaced, perfectly aware he could get
any girl he wanted.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">And
dump them just as fast</span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; text-align: center; text-indent: .3pt;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 150%;">~
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="Three">3</a> ~<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I gripped onto my backpack as I walked
past the large Victorian Gothic church with its deep-red door and brick and
stone exterior, heading down the walkway to the Fine Arts School. It was one of
the most prestigious art schools in New Zealand, one I was absolutely stoked to
have gotten into. I’d been told that I needed all A’s to have made it, but I
was an average student at anything other than Art and Art History. It was just
lucky that the selectors had seen something in my work, something they’d
thought was worthy of a place in their school.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I squinted as I rounded the curve of the
walkway, the New Zealand sunlight brighter than a nuclear blast. Although it
was autumn, it looked like summer had decided to stay, stopping the
neighbouring season from dropping its leaves and lowering the temperature,
which was why I’d chosen to wear my frayed jean skirt and sleeveless jean
jacket combo, with a bright yellow tank top underneath.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I walked past a row of bamboo trees, aiming
for the entrance of the grey and white Fine Arts building. It looked like it
had been taken out of an old fifties’ black and white film, with its corrugated
overhang, concrete and panelled walls, and rows of rectangular windows that
merged with a more modern-day addition. The main door was a lighter shade of
red than the church’s, beckoning me inside a small foyer. There was a library
on my left, a help desk directly in front, and a door on my right that I knew
led to the classrooms. I did a quick check of my timetable before heading
through that door, aiming for my Studio 1.1 class.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Finding the room surprisingly easy, I
pushed the door open, so excited I was almost shaking in my sandals. A number
of students were already in class, sitting around rows of work benches and chatting
between themselves. I glanced about, hoping to see Julia, but it looked like
she was running late—as usual, my best friend’s timekeeping not the best.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I chose a spot at the back of the class,
slipping my jean jacket off before sitting down. I went to place my backpack on
the chair next to me, wanting to save it for Julia, but the chair got swiped out
from under my bag, causing it to drop to the floor. I let out a surprised
shriek at the suddenness of it all, which would’ve been even louder if I’d
known who’d done it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Nico plonked himself down on Julia’s chair,
giving me a happy smile. “Cool,” he said, dropping his backpack next to mine. “At
least I know one person in class.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You c-can’t be in this class,” I
stuttered, not believing the coincidence was possible, nor wanting it to be. I
still couldn’t believe the stripper I’d masturbated over was my roommate’s
friend let alone went to the same university as me. There was no way he could
be in my Fine Arts class too!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He gave me a raised brow. “Then, why am I
here, babes?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“To hook up with me, and don’t call me <i>babes</i>,” I said, the name cringe-worthy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You’ve got some ego there, babe... See
what I did?” he said, waving a finger. “I took the <i>s </i>off, which makes it a whole new word, plus <i>babe </i>suits you, because you’re a total babe, which means you totally
deserve that massive ego of yours.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I spluttered out, “I don’t have a massive
ego,” not believing his gall.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He talked over me, “Anyway, what was that
about hooking up with me? Because I’m totally in with that, we can have a party
for two tonight.” He winked at me. “You know what I mean.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No,” I hissed, thinking his lines were
worse than Moe’s from <i>The Simpsons</i>,
but then again, he probably didn’t need to hone his pickup skills with the way
he looked. Something that was making me even more flustered, especially with
how close he was sitting to me, not to mention those freaky eyes of his. I’d
asked Annabelle whether they were contacts, and she said they weren’t, that he
had heterochromia—an eye condition that literally meant <i>different colours</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He continued, “A party for two means—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I know what it means,” I cut him off.
“You don’t have to explain.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Then, why did you say no?” he asked, as
though he’d never heard that word before.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Because I don’t want to hook up with
you.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">His smile didn’t wane, not even one bit. “You’re
saying one thing, yet I’m seeing something else.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Like what?” I said, annoyed he could tell
I was attracted to him. It was probably my cheeks, which felt like they were
melting. I wouldn’t be surprised if my amber eyes were dilated too, the guy sex
on two legs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“They say a girl can hide her arousal, but
that’s definitely not true for you.” He indicated to my chest. “Your nipples
are harder than my cock is right now.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My eyes widened. “They’re not hard for
you!” I blurted out, horrified he’d said that in public.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">People turned to look at us, causing me to
shrink in my chair. “Just leave me alone,” I hissed. “I’m not interested in
being treated like that girl in the cafeteria. Just because you’re gorgeous
doesn’t give you the right to be so horrible to people.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He smirked. “You think I’m gorgeous?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">My face fell. “No, I mean, yes, you are,
but just not to me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Then, why are you blushing like a nun in
a whorehouse?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“It’s because you’re making me feel uncomfortable,
so leave. Class will be starting soon.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Yes, <i>my</i>
class, which is <i>this</i> one, which means
I’m not going anywhere.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You are, you’re in my best friend’s
seat.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“She’s late, so it’s mine now.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He leaned down to his bag, pulling out a
small pad and a pencil case just as Julia walked into the classroom. She was
wearing skin-tight capris and a light-pink top, with a dark-pink bra playing
peekaboo underneath, something that would’ve gotten her sent home from the
strict Catholic school we’d met at.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She stopped next to Nico, her eyes going
from him to me, then back again, recognition then shock playing across her
face. He straightened and looked up at her, raising a brow in question as to
why she was staring at him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The lecturer, or professor, whatever he
was called, walked in right at that moment, causing Julia to quickly move to
the table in front of us. She placed her bag on the table top and looked back at
me with a question in her eyes, which flicked to Nico briefly. Luckily, he’d
lowered his head again, looking at something on his phone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I mouthed at her, “Turn around,” unable to
explain why I was sitting next to him right at this moment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Please put your phones away,” the
lecturer said, his eyes going to Nico.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Nico continued what he was doing, looking
like he was typing out a text.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I asked you to—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Before the lecturer could get another word
out, Nico tucked his phone away, probably having finished texting rather than
doing what the lecturer wanted. He looked up at the lecturer as though he
didn’t know why the man was looking at him. The lecturer frowned, but instead
of harping on at Nico, he turned his attention to the rest of the class.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’m Mr. Gregory, but I’m happy if you
call me Stuart. Though, one thing that I’m never happy about is the use of
phones in my studio. Please turn them off before entering and do not take them
out while in here. Since it’s your first day, I’ll let this indiscretion pass,”
he said, aiming a look at Nico, “but not from tomorrow onwards. And be aware
that most lecturers, tutors, and professors are like-minded. You’re here to
learn not to socialise.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Mr. Gregory started giving us a rundown on
what his class would entail. As he continued, Nico nudged me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You free tonight?” he asked.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No,” I said, doing my best to follow what
Mr. Gregory was saying.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Annabelle said you were.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I whipped my head around to him. “You’ve
been talking to Annabelle about me?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No,” he said, “but you didn’t deny not
being free, so looks like you’re free to check out my dorm room.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I stiffened. “I’m <i>not </i>interested in seeing it,” I hissed, making sure only he could
hear. “I’m not going to sleep with you, Nico, so stop bugging me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I didn’t ask you to, just wanted to show
you my dorm room. You’re the only person I know in class, so I thought we could
be friends. After all, we’re going to be sitting at the same table for this
class, so why not?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I went to tell him that I wouldn’t be
sitting with him after today, that I’d be sitting with Julia, but he continued,
not allowing me to get a word in edgeways.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Annabelle can come too,” he said. “We
hang out a lot together. We’ve been good mates ever since her uncle and my auntie
married. Pity they didn’t stay together, but that’s their business, not ours.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“At the back there,” the lecturer said.
“There’s to be no talking while I speak, unless asked to.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Nico’s eyes moved to him, giving him that
cheeky smile of his. “Yes, sir.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">The lecturer raised a brow, probably not
sure whether Nico was being a smart arse or not, then continued with what he
was talking about. Nico’s attention shifted away from him, landing on Julia,
who was taking sneaky glances back at him. If my leg was long enough, I
would’ve kicked her chair to get her to stop it, but it was too late, Nico
already noticing. He cocked his head to the side and stared right at her when
she looked back one too many times. She flushed, something that Julia didn’t do
that often, my friend usually the one who made boys flush. She quickly turned
away, facing the front once more.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">After class had finished, I grabbed my bag
and went for the door, hoping Nico didn’t follow me, especially since Julia was
going to drill me over him. I was in my next class quick smart, Julia snapping
at my heels like a little Chihuahua dog. She took the seat next to me and went
to open her mouth, but clamped it shut as Nico strolled through the door. His
unusual eyes went to Julia, annoyance playing across them, as though she’d
stolen his seat. But instead of saying anything, he took the chair in front of
her, pulling his pad out of his bag again, along with his pencil case, no
longer paying us any attention.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia placed her lips next to my ear.
“That’s the guy from—”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I know,” I said, cutting her off.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Why were you sitting next to him, then?”
she whispered.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“He knows my roommate,” I whispered back.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Does he remember you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I shook my head. “Though, he wants me to
come to his dorm room later.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Her baby blues widened, then a smile
pulled at her glossy pink lips. “Just make sure he wears a condom, don’t know
where his dick has been.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’m not interested.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“How can you not be? He’s drop-dead gorgeous.
I’d drop my knickers for him in a second.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Nico looked over his shoulder with a big
grin. “It’s a date, then, blondie. Bring the condoms. <i>Extra-</i>large<i>.</i>”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Nico,” I hissed. “You’re not getting with
my best friend.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">His eyes moved to me. “You jealous?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“<i>No</i>.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Then, what’s the problem?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“You don’t treat women very nicely.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“That’s a two-way street.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“What do you mean by that?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He opened his mouth to answer, but closed
it as the Drawing and Related Practices lecturer walked in. Nico turned to face
the front, listening to her as she introduced herself.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia flicked me a<i> What the hell?!</i> look, then turned her attention to the lecturer. I
tried to as well, but could barely take in what she was saying. Nico’s presence
in front of me was a constant distraction, to the point where I wanted to beg
the lecturer to end the class. So, as soon as it was finished, I was out the
door like the Flash, hoping that this time I could lose Nico, though I knew
there was no losing Julia, the girl Usain Bolt in heels.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">She appeared beside me as I exited the
foyer. “So, are you going to go to his place?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Of course not,” I said, glaring at her
sideways. “Even if he didn’t ask you for sex, I wouldn’t go.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“He was clearly joking, and if I were you,
I’d take up his invite.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Hell, no. He’s a total fuckboy.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Even fuckboys have their uses, which are
usually in bed.” She did a little shimmy as though she was imagining Nico between
her legs. “You’ll be too busy kissing his gorgeous lips for him to talk, and
once you’ve finished with him, toss him to the kerb. After all, if guys can do
that to us, we can do it right back to them.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“I’m okay with that,” a voice said behind
us.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">We stopped in our tracks and turned,
finding Nico grinning at us, the so-and-so having snuck up without us realising.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He held up his phone. “By the way,
Captain, Annabelle said she can make it tonight, which means you can come along
with her.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Am I invited too?” Julia asked, smiling
at him with her perfect veneers, interested in going where I wasn’t.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">His gaze flicked to her momentarily.
“Sure,” he muttered, obviously not caring whether she came or not. “So, are you
coming, Captain?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Yes,” Julia answered for me. “We’ll be
there. What time?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Seven,” he replied, his eyes remaining on
me. “You wanna grab a bite before the next class?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“No, I can’t,” I said, quickly formulating
a lie. “I’ve got a meeting with one of the Art History professors.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Okay, see you later, then.” He nodded at
Julia, then walked off, heading up the steep walkway.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Both Julia and I watched as he disappeared
around the corner. As soon as he was out of sight, Julia turned to me. “What
was that all about?” she growled, waving a finger about as though she was Beyoncé.
“He totally ignored me, like I wasn’t even hot.” She indicated to her body.
“This is hot!” She waved a hand in front of her face. “This is too!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I laughed, knowing she wouldn’t have let
his slight pass for long. “He must be blind, double J.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“More like B,” she said, looking down at
her boobs. She cupped them. “Do you think he would’ve looked at me if I had
Double D’s like you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Your tits are perfect as they are,”
someone said before I could, though I wouldn’t have called them <i>tits.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">I looked over my shoulder as a really tall
guy with muscular arms and a buzz cut came to a stop next to Julia. It looked
like he should be walking into an army camp rather than out of an Art school,
especially with his camo pants. He also had a cool black tattoo on his left
forearm of a cityscape, the skyscrapers reaching for his bicep.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">He indicated to where Nico had disappeared
around the corner. “You should be careful of Nico Bilan,” he said, looking down
at Julia, the height difference between them considerable, the guy well over
six foot. “I’ve known him for years. He’s nuts.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">Julia stared up at him in what I could
only refer to as awe. “How?” she breathed out, the guy fitting one of her types
to a T. She had contrasting tastes, going from liking stunning, model-like men
to total bruisers, especially if they were tall and muscular—like the guy
standing before us. If anything, she probably preferred bruisers the most.
She’d told me once that she loved getting her hands on ‘rough diamonds’ that she
could shape and polish, and this guy was most certainly one of those. Though, she
never succeeded in changing bruisers. Those types of guys always took her for a
ride, squeezing out as much money from her as they could get, then leaving her
high and dry as well as broken-hearted.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Nico’s mental,” the guy replied,
reminding me of what Annabelle had said about Nico. “He loses his shit real
easy, rants and yells at things that aren’t there, as well as overreacts. I’d
stay well clear of him.” He winked at Julia. “You’d be a lot safer with me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Will I, now?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;">“Most
definitely,” he grinned, his front tooth chipped, not convincing me at all.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman",serif; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 150%;"> ***</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 12pt; text-indent: 1cm;"> <b>Chapter 3 continues...</b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 12pt; text-indent: 1cm;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; text-indent: 1.0cm;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: 12pt; text-indent: 1cm;"><b> If you want to read more, the links to the whole book are below...</b></span></div>
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Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-12614735633419420052018-09-11T15:25:00.001-07:002018-09-11T15:29:56.018-07:00LOVE HATE LOVE and Why I Think I've Finally Gotten This Writing Gig Right<div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="ds0ba" data-offset-key="2iqf8-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">
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<span data-offset-key="2iqf8-0-0" style="font-family: inherit;">I can't wait to get LOVE HATE LOVE out to you all, I really mean that because I'm so excited about this book. I think I've FINALLY written a commercial book. In the past I've hoped for my books to do well, but deep down I knew they wouldn't give me what I wanted... TO LIVE OFF MY WRITING. Instead, they caused me financial woes, doing more damage to my bank account than righting it. But LOVE HATE LOVE... I think I have finally hit it on the nail with this one. Why is it so different? Because I have looked at a number of books that are successful out there and thought, why can't I write one too. I'm not a bad writer, just an ADHD one who does what she feels like at that moment, jeopardising my writing career over stories I like that will never make me a living. So, I thought why not write a popular genre like New Adult, because in all truth, most of my books can fall into new adult category due to my characters' ages. However, to make it fully New Adult I needed to step away from the gritty streets of South Auckland, walking away from writing street lit, and set my story in a university, where a lot of NA books are set. I originally was going to set it in America, but I thought, since I live within walking distance of the best university in New Zealand, why not write about that one. And why not set it in a Fine Arts school, after all I was an artist, plus an art history graduate and post graduate from the university the book is based on. So, I had some knowledge about the location/environment. I could also walk up to the buildings and describe them for my book.</span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="51dqu-0-0" style="font-family: inherit;">Anyway, I'm getting off track. Now I have a NA book, set in a university, and for once it's written from ONLY one perspective. I don't tend to do that, multiple viewpoints usually my thing, Don't Peek and I Love You, Salvatore the exceptions to the rule. But those two weren't full novels, and nothing like LOVE HATE LOVE, which is a rather large book. This is why I didn't think writing this book would be an easy task to do. But it just flowed, flowed so fast that I will be publishing a book in the quickest time ever. It practically took me about two weeks to write the first draft, a draft that is over 100,000 words long. Like, WTF?!!! THAT has NEVER happened before. And why did it flow that well? Because I totally got into the story, walking through Auckland University, seeing what my characters were seeing, and writing about an area that I'm so familiar with. Also, throw in Annabelle from one of my other series, along with a guest appearance from her cop, Dante, and Kara, and I felt like I was back in the Broken Lives and Behind the Lives world without falling into their crazy way of speaking as well as their crazy lives. Though, don't get me wrong, some of the characters aren't sane in LOVE HATE LOVE, or in particular, Nico Bilan is definitely NOT sane. He has psychosis, which is something unfortunately I know a bit about. Not me, someone I know has it, someone who has been in and out of mental health institutions because of it. So, I knew how Nico would act, what he would do, the irrational things, the paranoia thrown in, knew it far too well, making this character very real to me. The topic of PSYCHOSIS was what made me write this book. But it's ended up being a lot more, with an interesting cast of characters, an interesting storyline, and two main characters who you will want to ship to death.</span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="4n0bi-0-0" style="font-family: inherit;">So, I think I have finally rounded up all the ingredients for a successful book. Have finally written something that hopefully will pull me out the the depression of not succeeding as a writer. Because I'm saying it now, I think this book will be a turning book for my career. Now, let's see if you all agree when you start reading it.</span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="9ljh0-0-0" style="font-family: inherit;">WISH ME LUCK!!!</span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="9ljh0-0-0" style="font-family: inherit;">*LOVE HATE LOVE is due out October 30.</span></div>
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<span data-offset-key="9ljh0-0-0" style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18194788-love-hate-love">https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18194788-love-hate-love</a></span></div>
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Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-12489353134223892682018-07-12T15:34:00.002-07:002018-07-12T16:11:14.838-07:00Crying Out Silent is on NetGalley and Amazon<b><i>Crying Out Silent</i></b> is now live on both NetGalley and Amazon. It's a <i>Read Now</i> for NetGalley reviewers, so you don't have to wait for approval, it's already been given. The links for the book as well as it's blurb are all below. Though, please note that the book will only be available on NetGalley for July.<br />
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<a href="https://www.netgalley.com/catalog/book/143896">NetGalley Link</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07F36MSG6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1530220076&sr=1-1&keywords=crying+out+silent">US AMAZON</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07F36MSG6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1530220076&sr=1-1&keywords=crying+out+silent">UK AMAZON</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B07F36MSG6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1530220076&sr=1-1&keywords=crying+out+silent">AUS AMAZON</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B07F36MSG6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1530220076&sr=1-1&keywords=crying+out+silent">CA AMAZON</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.fr/dp/B07F36MSG6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1530220076&sr=1-1&keywords=crying+out+silent">FR AMAZON</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.it/dp/B07F36MSG6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1530220076&sr=1-1&keywords=crying+out+silent">IT AMAZON</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.de/dp/B07F36MSG6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1530220076&sr=1-1&keywords=crying+out+silent">DE AMAZON</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com.br/dp/B07F36MSG6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1530220076&sr=1-1&keywords=crying+out+silent">BR AMAZON</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com.mx/dp/B07F36MSG6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1530220076&sr=1-1&keywords=crying+out+silent">MX AMAZON</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.co.jp/dp/B07F36MSG6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1530220076&sr=1-1&keywords=crying+out+silent">JP AMAZON</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.nl/Crying-Silent-English-Marita-Hansen-ebook/dp/B07F36MSG6?__mk_nl_NL=%C3%85M%C3%85%C5%BD%C3%95%C3%91&keywords=crying+out+silent+marita&qid=1531434547&sr=8-1&ref=sr_1_1">NL AMAZON</a></div>
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<i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;"><b>Two high school students make an unlikely alliance - one their friends must break before death does.</b> </i><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">The day I met Ash Rata was the first day I started dying, not because of Ash, but because of one of his friends. Ant Torres made me suffer, tormenting me because he thought I was a pretty boy. I </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">am</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;"> a boy, yet I’m also a girl. Neither one nor the other, but both.</span><br />
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<i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Intersex.</i><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">While Ant was a closeted gay rugby player who used violence to get what he wanted.</span><br />
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<i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Me.</i><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">But I didn’t want him – I wanted the unattainable.</span><br />
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<i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Ash.</i><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">The beautiful boy who was hiding a secret as big as mine, one that would unite us... </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">until death do us part.</i><br />
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<i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Please note that this book contains sensitive topics such as suicide and assault. (R18)</i></div>
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Marita A. Hansenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17538625871732733498noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5789361734083535010.post-25733291851459551562018-05-03T02:06:00.001-07:002018-05-05T15:43:46.483-07:00CRYING OUT SILENT Chapter 1 Sneak Peak: Where it began for L & Ash.<div class="s1utahl7-0 dmXaGo" data-tag="post-content" style="background-color: white; color: #052d49; font-family: America, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 1.5; white-space: pre-line;">
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<strong>Trigger Warning: </strong>Chapter 1 contains violence, sexual assault, and bad language. Bullying and Suicide are <i>Crying Out Silent's main </i>themes, depicting how two teens came to consider taking such drastic measures to stop their pain. <i>Crying Out Silent </i>is the prequel to Ash and L's book <i>Ashes to Ashes. </i><b>Ash is Dante Rata's older brother</b>, while L is Dante's guitarist. L is an intersex character, who is a partial hermaphrodite. This chapter will also introduce you to Anthony "Ant" Torres, who will be the main character in <i>Stepped On</i>, which is the second story in the<i> A Broken Lives Short Story </i>series. That story also has Murderer and Nike in it, detailing what happened when they went into Ant's place to get Kara back, not knowing she wasn't there.</div>
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So, let's get down to actually reading the chapter!</div>
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<strong>Copyright</strong></div>
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<em>Crying Out Silent</em></div>
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Copyright 2018 © Marita A. Hansen</div>
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Editor: John Hudspith</div>
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All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means whatsoever without the written permission of the author, nor circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author. For subsidiary rights inquiries email: <a href="mailto:marita.a.hansen@hotmail.com" rel="noopener noreferrer" style="background-color: transparent; color: #f96854; cursor: pointer; font-weight: 700; text-decoration-line: none;" target="_blank">marita.a.hansen@hotmail.com</a></div>
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All characters, names, places, and incidents in this book are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual events, locales, or real persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.</div>
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<strong>UK English is used due to the New Zealand setting.</strong></div>
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All other variations are also due to where the book is set, as well as the characters’ cultural and socio-economic backgrounds. This is why some characters use different speech patterns from others, such as in the use of <em>cos </em>versus <em>’cause </em>or <em>wuz </em>versus <em>was. </em>In the case of <em>cos</em> and <em>wuz</em>, the dialogue is used to represent a Māori accent. Though, please note that not all Māori speak the same way, plus many of my characters are of mixed heritage, such as Ash Rata. Ash is half Croatian, almost half Māori, and the rest Romanian. But due to where he grew up in South Auckland, he speaks more like his father than his mother.</div>
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I hope this explains the way in which dialogue is presented in <em>Crying Out Silent.</em><span style="font-size: 1rem;"> </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">LLEWELLYN DAVIES</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">February 2000</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The boy was sitting on the other side of my new homeroom, staring at me like he wanted to play dot-to-dot with the freckles on my face. It reminded me of the bullies from my last school, which I had to leave due to being picked on relentlessly. And he was big like them, even looked a bit like the ringleader with his number one haircut and rough features. He was the type of guy who’d be at home on the rugby field or in a WWF ring. I tried not to
look back, knowing it could get me hurt, but I couldn’t help it, because his stare was like a magnet, drawing my gaze to him.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Anthony Torres!” the teacher called out.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The boy’s gaze snapped to the teacher. “It’s Ant, and you know it!”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The teacher visibly tensed. “Watch your tone! I won’t put up with it this year.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">A smile split Ant’s face, which made the teacher shake his head. The man didn’t look much older than Ant. Even from across the room I could see the stubble on Ant’s face, not something that was common with Fifth Form students. I wondered whether he’d been held back a year or—with the way he looked—five, because there was no way he could be fifteen or sixteen.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">He looked back at me and lifted his chin up in what appeared to be a friendly hello. The dreadlocked kid sitting behind him glanced my way, probably wondering who Ant was looking at. He frowned when his gaze landed on me. He said something to Ant, which wiped the smile off Ant’s face. Looking angry, Ant snapped something back, then his gaze returned to me. He scowled for a second, then a mean grin split his features. He pushed his tongue against his cheek and moved his fist in front of his mouth, doing the cock-sucking gesture.
My face heated, my complexion no doubt resembling raspberries splattered across snow. I was pale-skinned and had orange hair, which I’d inherited from my Welsh ancestry. My family had moved to New Zealand five years prior—when I was ten.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Both Ant and his friend laughed, the third boy in their group looking like he wanted to be in on the joke.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Ant and Joel, please be quiet,” the young teacher said, glancing up from his desk. I couldn’t remember his name since he hadn’t bothered to write it on the whiteboard. Though, he didn’t look like someone who got called Mr. often due to having as many, if not more, zits than the teenagers he was paid to teach.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Ant grinned back at the teacher, while Joel, who I assumed was the dreadlocked kid, sniggered. The teacher sighed then looked back down at his list, continuing to call out students’ names.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The door banged opened, pulling my attention away from the man. A tall boy walked into the room, looking out of breath, as though he’d run a mile. His wavy black hair was a mess, but to my eyes it looked perfect. If it wasn’t for his scruffy uniform, he could’ve walked out of a fashion catalogue, the guy model-beautiful.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Ash,” the teacher said, sounding exasperated, “it’s not a good way to start the year by being late on your first day. I hope this isn’t going to be a repeat of last year.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Ash grimaced. “I had to take my bro to school. The li’l shithead totally made me late.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“<i>Watch</i> your language.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“I didn’t say anything wrong.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“You swore.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“No I didn’t.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The teacher exhaled loudly, like it pained him to be here. “Just take a seat.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Mumbling something under his breath, Ash weaved his way between the desks, grinning at a pretty blonde girl with pink streaks in her hair. He blew her a kiss, causing the girl to giggle, then climbed over the dreadlocked boy’s desk to get to the one by the window.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Ash! Do <i>not</i> climb over desks,” the teacher snapped.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Sorry,” Ash said sarcastically.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">His mates started sniggering, Ant the only exception. I blinked, realising he was still staring at me, <i>no</i>, he wasn’t staring, he was <i>glaring</i>. He looked like he wanted to punch me, something I’d seen on too many bullies’ faces. I dropped my gaze to my desk, which was where I should’ve kept it in the first place.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">As soon as the bell rang, I jumped up and grabbed my bag, heading for the door as fast as I could, but two girls at the front of the class stopped to talk to each other, blocking my way. Apologising, I pushed between them, then had to stop again as a massive girl stepped in front of me. She peered over my head, calling out for her friends to hurry up.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Hey, new kid!” Ant yelled out.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I looked in his direction. He was heading my way, the dreadlocked boy behind him grinning.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Ant, come here,” the teacher said.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Ant ignored him, pushing a student aside. He was so tall it made me feel even smaller. I was considerably shorter, only five-foot-four, while Ant had to be at least six foot, if not more.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Anthony!” the teacher barked, his face going bright red from being ignored.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Ant stopped and turned to the teacher. “What?!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Resting his hands on the desk, the teacher pushed to his feet, his expression furious. “If you keep this attitude up, you’ll be seeing the inside of the principal’s office more than my classroom.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Sorry, ma’am. I’ll be a good boy, just for you.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The teacher’s jaw clenched, giving the impression he was going to give Ant a blasting.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The massive girl finally moved out of my way. Seeing my opportunity to escape, I took off out of the room, rushing down the corridor, slipping between the crowds of students coming out of their homerooms. I headed into the boys’ restroom and planted myself in one of the stalls, using the door as a barrier to the outside world. I was used to seeing the back of toilet
doors. It was always the first place I went to when I thought I was going to be bullied, and right now, I had more than a gut feeling that Wera High was going to be no different from my last school.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Since everyone in my class had English next, I decided to skip the lesson, because there was no way I was risking going near Ant. Ignoring the crude drawings on the toilet door, I hung my bag on the hook and put the toilet lid down to sit on. I grabbed my novel out of my bag and started reading it. Over the next hour or so, students came in and out of the restroom sporadically. I lifted my feet occasionally, willing the minutes to tick by faster,
while hoping I wouldn’t get in trouble for skipping class.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The bell for the end of English rang, which resulted in more people using the toilets, until it finally quietened down. I sat silently, continuing to read my book, totally wrapped up in the story. It was <i>Carrie</i> by Stephen King. I’d only just started it a couple of days ago, but I liked it a lot, and sort of sympathised with the main character, because she was picked on like I had been… no, <i>was </i>being.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Everything went quiet for a while, then the door opened. A male laugh filled the room, followed by a female voice shushing him. A bang on my door made me lift my feet off the floor. On the other side, I heard a noise, which suggested someone was looking underneath my door. I sucked in a breath, praying they didn’t see me. A few seconds later, the door next to mine closed, the lock clicking in place. I exhaled soundlessly, relieved that I hadn’t been
caught.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The girl started giggling, which stopped abruptly. “Shouldn’t you wear a condom?” she said.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Why? It’s not like I’m fucking your pussy,” the boy answered gruffly, sounding like Ant.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“But I thought you were.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Nope.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Then, what do you want?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“I wanna fuck your arse.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“No way!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“You said yes before.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Only cos I thought we were having normal sex.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Well, too bad, you agreed.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">A bang followed, the girl yelping in response. “Don’t, Ant!” she cried.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“C’mon, Kelley, you promised, and if you don’t, I’ll tell everyone you did it anyway.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“I don’t wanna— Ouch!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Stay<i> still</i>.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Ant!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Another bang happened.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Okay, okay!” she cried. “I’ll do it, just don’t hurt me.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">A scuffling sound followed.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“No, Ant, put on a condom.” She yelped again. “Let go, that hurts.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Then stop bitching and turn around.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Put on a condom first.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“I don’t have one.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Then it can wait.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“No, it can’t, you got me hard, so turn the fuck around.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The girl let out a cry.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Shut the fuck up or someone will hear,” Ant snapped.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Just stop pushing me.” She let out a shriek. “What are you doing?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“You said not to hurt you, so I’m loosening you up.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“That feels wrong, I don’t like it.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Just shut up, you’re pissing me off.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">A rustling followed, along with a zipper being pulled down. The girl squealed, which was abruptly cut short, sounding like Ant had clamped a hand over her mouth. The girl sniffled while Ant grunted and moaned. I wondered whether I should say something, but instead pressed my lips together, too scared to open my mouth, Ant terrifying me.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Not long after, Ant let out a gasp, then everything went quiet for several seconds, even the girl silent. Rustling clothes followed, then they left, disappearing with the bang of the main door.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I exhaled, relieved that they were gone, but still upset over what I'd heard. I wondered who the girl was, the name Kelley not meaning anythingto me. Was she from mine and Ant’s class? Or from another one? And if she was from my class, should I speak to her, making sure she was all right? Because what Ant did...</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Was it rape?</span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Feeling sick over it, I opened the door and went for the sink, freezing at the sight of Ant. He was leaning against the wall by the urinals with his arms crossed over his broad chest, staring at me. I blinked, taken aback he was still here, too tongue-tied and scared to utter a word.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">He pushed away from the wall and walked towards me, making me back up fast. “Enjoy the show?” he said.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">My back hit the stall frame. “I didn’t see anything,” I spluttered out, finally finding my voice.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">He stopped in front of me, giving me a stare down. “Not even a peek under the door?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“No,” I replied, realising he must’ve known I was there all along.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“What you heard is none of your business.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I nodded vigorously. “I won’t say a word, I promise.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“You bet you won’t.” He reached out to touch my hair, which was long, almost reaching to the small of my back. “Are you a girl or a boy?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“A boy,” I replied with my usual answer, even though it was only partially true.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Then why do you have long hair?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“I like heavy metal.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">He wrinkled his nose, as though my reply offended him. “Well, you should cut it, cos it makes you look like a girl—or gay. Are you gay?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I shook my head, telling the truth. I didn’t care what was in someone’s pants. I was equally attracted to both females and males—as long as they were beautiful. Not pretty or hot. <i>Beautiful. </i>Otherwise they didn’t capture my attention. As a small kid, I used to cut out
pictures of models from my mam’s old magazines, fascinated by how perfect they looked. Back then I’d thought they were angels, graced by God’s hand, but now I just liked to look at them.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Well, I reckon you are gay,” Ant said.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">He glanced down at my crotch, making me worry that I hadn’t done up my fly. Unlike his black pants, I was wearing the summer version of Wera High’s uniform, which was black shorts and a white button-down shirt, my red jumper in my bag.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">His hazel gaze returned to my face. “At homeroom, you were staring at my mate like you wanted Ash to fuck ya.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">My eyes widened in horror. “No I wasn’t!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Don’t lie.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“I’m not!” I said, feeling my cheeks heat up. I hadn’t even thought about sex, just had been enthralled by Ash’s beauty.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Doesn’t matter anyway, cos you’re sweet outta luck with him. He’s straight.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“I wasn’t looking at him like that, I swear.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Still lying, but I understand why you were lookin’. That prick’s a pretty bastard. Too bad he’s a pussy-muncher, totally into it, can’t get enough of slurping up those fishy juices...”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I gaped at him, his words shocking me.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">He continued, “And Ash would pro’bly punch you if he knew you were eye-fucking him, so you’re lucky he didn’t notice.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“I promise I wasn’t eye— Doing anything like that.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Quit it, I already told ja I don’t believe ya.” He looked me up and down. “You’re so tiny, a total pocket fuck. How old are ya?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Fifteen,” I said, not knowing what a ‘pocket fuck’ was.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“You totally don’t look it. I thought maybe you’d been put up a class.” He grinned. “I betcha your dick is small too, that’s if you even have one.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“I have one!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">His grin widened. “Prove it, then.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I took a step to the side. “No way!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Is it cos you’re a lesbo, pretending to be a guy?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“No! And I’m not going to show you my...” I cleared my throat, not wanting to say it.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Stop being a pussy-shit. If you’re really a guy, I’ll see it when you piss at the urinals, so you might as well show me now. Unless you sit on the toilet for a piss, cos you’re a girl.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“I’m <i>not </i>a girl.” A lie, but only a partial one.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Prove it.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I glanced at the door, praying someone would come in.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">He smiled knowingly. “It’s class time, which means no one’s gonna save your girly arse, so show me or I’ll make you.” He took a step closer.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Scared he would actually do it, I quickly unzipped my shorts and pushed them down, along with my briefs, my dick too small to pull out. Not only that, it was trying to disappear inside my body, fear shrivelling it up, making it even smaller than it was. The doctor had said that the abnormality was due to me being intersex—or a partial hermaphrodite, since I didn’t have a vagina.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“What the fuck!” Ant said, looking shocked. “What happened to your dick and balls?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Nothing.” I quickly pulled my pants up and did the zipper, wishing I hadn’t relented.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Yeah, <i>nuthin’</i> is defo the word, cos you’ve got <i>nuthin’ </i>down there. Even a baby has a bigger dick than you, and I don’t even know if you can call those balls. It looks like you’ve superglued your pussy together.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Tears started to well up in my eyes. I wanted to hit him for saying that, but knew I’d be the only one getting hurt. Then to my shock, he unzipped his pants and pulled out his own dick. My eyes went massive, but not because his dick was small—it was humungous!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“The head of my cock is bigger than your whole cock,” he said. “Hell, I could hardly see your cock it’s so minute. Have you had a sex change? Cos that thing looks like an oversized clit.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“No!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Well, if you’re lying, I’d ask for my money back, cos the cowboy doc did a shit job. Still, I’d hit that. You’re hot.” He reached for my shorts, unzipping them before I realised what he was doing.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I smacked his hand away. “Don’t touch me!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">His face turned vicious. “Don’t fuckin’ tell me what to do, you li’l bitch,” he spat.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .3pt;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">He pushed me against the wall, but instead of hitting me, he smashed his lips against mine. I was in too much shock to do anything, his kiss blindsiding me. He bit my lip, making me squeal. As soon as I opened my mouth, he slipped his tongue inside. I tried to shove him away, but couldn’t get him to budge, his chest as solid as a brick wall.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">He stopped kissing me and spun me around, pushing me into the toilet stall. I righted myself and went to leave, but he slammed me against the stall’s wall, knocking the wind out of me. Then he was yanking down my shorts, making me panic. I went to scream no, but instead jolted as a door banged. Ant instantly let go of me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“You in ’ere, Ant?” someone called out.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Looking panicked, Ant quickly stuffed his hard cock into his pants, then threw a punch at me, hitting me in the eye. I cried out and slumped to the floor.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“That’ll teach you for wanking next to me, you faggot!” he yelled.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The dreadlocked kid from homeroom appeared in the stall’s doorway. I quickly covered my groin, unable to stop from sobbing uncontrollably, the pain in my eye, as well as the horror of what Ant had done to me, fuelling my tears.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Joel’s expression turned from surprised to disgusted. “Fuckin’ pervo fag,” he spat, making me shrink in humiliation.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Ant snapped, “Let’s go!”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">They moved away...</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">...and that was when I saw him.</span></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Ash.</span></i></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">He was staring down at me with a sympathetic expression. For a second, I thought he was going to help me, but then he followed the others out, leaving me on the toilet floor, crying my heart out.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I stayed there for what felt like forever, in too much shock to do anything else. I didn’t understand why this had happened to me, couldn’t even start to comprehend any of it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Someone entered the restroom, finally snapping me out of my stunned state. I quickly pulled my shorts up just as a kid stopped at the urinals across from the toilet stall. I pushed to my feet, capturing his attention. He looked over his shoulder, his eyebrows winging up as he caught sight of me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Are you all right?” he asked.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I shook my head and snatched up my bag, not sure I’d ever be right after what Ant had done. I was out the door before the kid could say another word, running home, only stopping briefly to use my inhaler. I let myself in, my mam and sister at work. And when my mother returned that night, asking what had happened to my eye, I lied, telling her a ball had hit me during P.E. She asked again, obviously not believing me due to my track record of being
bullied. But I reassured her that it had been purely an accident, and that I’d tell her instantly if I was being bullied again. She relaxed a little after that, though still gave me worried glances over dinner. I knew what she was thinking—that someone had punched me. And I wanted to tell her she was right, but then I would have to tell her everything that came before it.</span></div>
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<i><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Which I could never do.</span></i></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The next day I was too terrified to go to school, so I stayed home. It had been easy to do since my mam and sister left for work early. I sat down at my desk, detailing everything that had happened in my diary. I stopped at the part where Ant had pulled down my shorts. I closed my eyes, imagining what could’ve happened if his friends hadn’t walked in, but I couldn’t, or more like, I didn’t want to, because it was beyond terrifying.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I pushed up from my chair and turned to the full-length mirror on the wardrobe, wondering why Ant had gotten hard over me. I was nothing to look at: too skinny, too pale, with freckles and orange hair that could blind you. I turned my face from side to side, not seeing anything that could be remotely hot. All I saw was me, a person who was both male and female, stuck in a world that only allowed me to be one or the other. Since I was born without a vagina, my parents had brought me up as a boy, something I knew didn’t feel right, but I didn’t think changing to a girl was right either. I was neither, yet both.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The phone rang, jolting me out of my thoughts. I ran for it, picking it up before I realised my mistake.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">A woman’s voice came over the line. “May I speak to your mother?”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“She’s at work,” I answered.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Is this Llewellyn?”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Yes,” I said softly.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Well, this is Mrs. Smithe, the school secretary, and, Llewellyn, you’re supposed to be at school. Are you ill?”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Yes.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Then please tell your mother that I called, and if you take any sick days off she needs to phone in, and if you miss three days or more you have to bring in a doctor’s note.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I agreed, then hung up. My heart started racing at the thought of having to go back—of facing Ant, his friends, and the whole school. I imagined getting shouldered into lockers, taunts of being a fag thrown at me, sneers and jeers. Then what the woman had said about a doctor’s note gave me an idea. I headed into the kitchen and grabbed a chair, dragging it over to the cupboard. I climbed onto it and started searching through the med kit in the
top cupboard, hoping to find something that would make me sick. I pulled out a box of pills, which only said to take two at a time. I wondered whether it would make me sick if I took five. I stuffed the box into my pocket, planning on taking the pills just before my mam got home.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">For the rest of the day, I watched TV or read more of <i>Carrie</i>, then, as planned, I took the
pills just before six. A little while after taking them I started feeling light-headed, but not sick. Not what I wanted. I slumped onto the couch, realising I hadn’t put the pill packet away. I reached for it, but my hand flopped down.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">A noise came from the front door. I looked up, everything blurring, only the sound of my sister’s voice alerting me to who it was.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Are you okay, Louie?” she asked.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Tired,” I mumbled.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Louie, what’s wrong?”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">“Just tired.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">She went quiet for a moment, then screamed, “Mam!” I closed my eyes, hearing our mother’s startled voice a few seconds later. A slap stung my face, followed by Mam shouting, “Open your eyes, baby. Open your eyes!”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">But I couldn’t. My head was all fogged up, taking me to another place. My sister started babbling, saying our address to someone before I lost consciousness.</span></div>
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If you would like to continue reading <i>Crying Out Silent</i>, you can either connect with my Patreon page to read the parts as they are uploaded or wait until it's published as a novel on Amazon, which will be either late June or early July. This chapter is taken from Part 1 on Patreon. Don't read Part 2 until you've finished Part 1 (Chapters 1 to 4).</div>
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Marita-A.-Hansen/e/B005H5W79K/ref=dp_byline_cont_ebooks_1">Amazon Author Page</a></div>
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